At Uncyclopedia they tend to think I'm a turtle. Well, unfortunately, I'm not. However, I do have a pet turtle named Giovanni, and he looks kinda like this one here.

Hello, my real name is Tompkins. But upon trying to register that account I was informed that one by the same name already existed. However, as you can see Tompkins has no contributions. Way to go wikipedia... maybe it's time to dust off that old script in the corner and clear out all of the useless user accounts laying around here. In the meantime, I'll just be using this one.

Anyway, as I said, I'm Tompkins, and I'm also an administrator at Uncyclopedia - not that I'm an administrator here or anything. I used to play alexadex, now urladex, but recently I've started trading on a free online prediction market called CENIMAR. Anyway, at Uncyclopedia I delete a lot of crap, and ban a lot of users, so i don't have a lot of time to contribute anymore. But back in the good ol' days, when I still contibuted regularly, I wrote 5 featured articles. Maybe I'll write one here someday as well, but I doubt it. It's hard for me to be serious, so you'll probably find most of my actual contributions to be somewhat on the "different" side.

Well, that's about it. I'm usually on IRC and stuff if you ever would want to talk to me for some reason... I don't come in the #wikipedia channel much, and when I do it's usually under the nickname 'breasts.' So, if you were serious about talking to me, you'd might want to /join #uncyclopedia and talk to me there. Until then, read some of the articles I started...