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why do we cheat

The question is why do humans cheat on their loved one? Monogamy does not come naturally, and biology predisposes us to seek multiple sex partners. Sexual infidelity is one of humanity's great obsessions, perhaps second only to violence. We abhor it, yet we want to hear all about it, and some can't resist it. We don’t say that sexual fidelity is impossible or wrong because it is not natural, only that it takes some effort. We human beings spend a large part of our lives learning to do unnatural things, like play the violin or type on a computer,Dr Phil

Women tend to have an emotional connection with their lover and are more likely to have an affair because of loneliness, Fisher says."Women tend to be unhappy with the relationship they are in ... while men can be a lot happier in their primary relationship and also cheat.”Women are more interested in supplementing their marriage or jumping ship than men are -- for men, it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate." 34% of women who had affairs were happy or very happy in their marriage. A greater percentage of men, who had affairs, 56%, were happy in their marriage. The theory that adultery is "natural" for men, fulfilling their Darwinian need to spread their seed, has been around a long time. But the connection women look for when having affairs may have evolutionary roots as well. People crave and demand affection and attention but are not able to return it in kind. Those who aren't pursuers may be susceptible to an affair because they are not aware that something is amiss or lacking in the relationship. Given the attention of another man or woman, "they just suddenly feel more special.

“By zebald ndjarakana” Besides the great pressure from religious and cultural mores to stay faithful, and the threat of retribution, there are prizes for fidelity. There are more complex types of happiness to be found in behaving in an open and moral way, negotiating whatever problems there are, Monogamy is "essentially an arms treaty," Given the ubiquity of sexual jealousy, I will agree not to make my partner crazy with sexual jealousy by foreclosing some of my sexual options, if my partner agrees not to make me crazy by foreclosing his options. “People who enter into long-term monogamous relationship, and who really keep their promises, tend to be very healthy mentally”

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