User:Musicman1996/sandbox

Critique of "Identity Politics" Article

In the article for Identity Politics, there were many great facts stated but more needed to be written before a sufficient article can arise from this current draft. There were many missing identities that were not mentioned including race, education, disability, etc. The summary of the article states that identity politics refers to any identity one may have relating to "age, social class, culture, dialect, disability, education, ethnicity, language, nationality, gender identity, generation, occupation, profession, race, religion, sexual orientation, settlement, urban and rural habitation, and veteran status." Although they are mentioned in the summary, none of these identities are heavily mentioned in the article. The identity that is mostly referred to is sexual orientation, talking mostly about the LGBTQ rights movement and briefly mentioning race. On top of this, intersectionality is referred to in a separate section, but deals with race and feminism in a brief sense. Credibility will come to this article once more identities are researched and added to this article.

Another critique regarding this article involves the layout. There is a nice transition from the history of the term identity politics to different debates regarding identities. Like previously mentioned, the debates mostly focus on LGBTQ identities and briefly mentions gender and race identities. Regardless of their content, the flow of the article gets interrupted when the third section is introduced. The third section's name is "Art and Culture" which is a nice fit following the debates of identity politics. That being said, the paragraph following the title does not match fully match the rest of the article. The paragraph is very staggered and utilizes minimal citations, leading one to suggest that all "facts" stated are opinions or false. Also, the author doesn't elaborate on the different songs, bands, and albums referred to in the paragraph and the whole section seems out of place compared to the history and debate sections. In order to improve the article, many revisions are needed for this specific section and also the addition of more art and culture, besides music genres, will be needed.

The sources in the article are diverse and seem to spread out from just online sources; some of the citations refer to physical books and encyclopedias. Noting this, some of the sources are not the most reliable and seem to be added just to have a source. For example, the source referring to Disco, source 30, leads one to a website labeled Allmusic. This specific website is not a reputable source and appears to be more of an opinionated piece of information. The fact that is related to this source should be researched more to see if there is another, more reputable source out there that can lay truth to the claim.

The article itself is on a nice path. There are many revisions in its future in order to make it a headlining article on Wikipedia. Future editors should focus on adding sources and elaborating on more than the mainstream identities. I would love to see a section on profession and nationality added to the debate section; also, one may look into adding a definition section to acquaint readers with what each identity entails (i.e. religion would include Catholic, Mormonism, Protestant, etc.).

Spirit Day - Draft

Brittany McMilan

Brittany McMilan was a high school student in 2010 when she started working with GLAAD, Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, to create the first ever Spirit Day. McMilan said about the event, “Ultimately, I want Spirit Day to make just one person feel a little bit better about his or herself, to feel safe enough in their own skin to be proud of who they are.” Since 2010, Brittany, with the help of GLAAD, has inspired many celebrities, companies, and schools to wear purple and stand up against bullying.  

Participation

Through the many celebrations that have happened since 2010, some notable celebrities include, Britney Spears, Ana Marie Cox, Vanessa Carlton, and Kristin Chenoweth. In 2013, support grew to involve the White House, Oprah Winfrey, Ashton Kutcher, MTV, OWN, Logo, Sundance, Facebook, to name a few. During the 2013 holiday, "The White House tweeted using #SpiritDay and directed followers to stopbullying.gov." Additionally, many celebrities changed their social media platforms to reflect the LGBT holiday. American Apparel posted a separate store for Spirit Day where shoppers would receive 10% select purple items and the company would donate 10% to benefit GLAAD's work towards equality. In 2014, Laverne Cox, a transgender actress and activist, went to New York City and hosted an event in which she helped turn the lights on that were strung on the Empire State Building. In support for Spirit Day, she said, “All of our children need to feel safe to be themselves at home, school and in our communities.”  

History

In 2016, a few years after Spirit Day became an official LGBT holiday, McMilan reflected saying, “It’s the participants that make Spirit Day what it is; they create their own events and their own art, all in the name of showing LGBTQ young people that they care… I know how much it means to people around the world to know that they are supported by their communities.” Additionally, GLAAD’s VP of Programming, Zeke Stokes, shared the appreciation by saying that the words and pictures that come from a holiday like Spirit Day, illustrates the love and compassion towards the LGBTQ community, leading to youths living their authentic lives. McMilan stated that she is trying to find ways to keep Spirit Day going since the internet and social media continue to change.  

I will also be adding the fact that Brittany based the wearing purple on Canada’s Pink Shirt Day. This will be added in the Overview area.

Response to John's Draft (from Stephanie)

Hi John, thanks for helping me find your sandbox so that I can leave my response. I also had trouble figuring this out!

I think your information about McMillan is great and I like the incorporation of her quote. My only critique there is that you should not put "etc" in a Wikipedia article, lest it look unprofessional! I would leave it as "celebrities, companies, and schools" or if you want to include more facilities/organizations/people, that you include them in your list. Just so that it is more clear than "etc".

Your participation section also looks good! I would adjust the phrasing "lit up the Empire State Building". Just clarify what you meant! Say she strung it with lights or hosted event in which the group of people turned on all the lights or what not. A little more specificity would clarify what you mean by 'lit up' and the significance of lighting the building.

Under your history section, the phrase would be "after Spirit Day became an official LGBT holiday" not "being". Also would it be LGBT or LGBTQ? However, the rest of your wording looks great!

I think you have a really good draft so far! Your writing is clear and objective, and you add a lot of valuable details to the origin of Spirit Day. I like that you expand on participants too. It all adds much more history and understanding. Your sources look really good too. Clearly, the GLAAD website is very reliable, but nbc news is also good. The other source I am unfamiliar with, so maybe see if that website drew its information from another source. Personally, even just reading that, I feel like I've learned a lot more than I knew before! Really awesome job!!

-Stephanie