User:Jimbo Wales/WikiProject Wikipedians for Jimbo's beard/to do

• Collect donated hair to paste to Jimbo's face
• Collect donations for superglue / PVA glue to stick donated hair onto Jimbo's face in the case of an attack
• Hire beard assassin assassins.
• In the event that beard assassin assassins are unsuccessful, procure a large supply of industrial strength Rogaine
• In the event that WP:BEARDMUSTGO hires beard assassin assassin assassins to assassinate beard assassin assassins, allowing beard assassins to assassinate Jimbo's beard, hire beard assassin assassin assassin assassins to assassinate beard assassin assassin assassins, allowing beard assassin assassins to assassinate beard assassins and prevent the assassination of Jimbo's beard.
• H@x0r WP:BEARDDELETE (Triumphant success, for that detestable link is red. We're so 1337, it's frightening.)
• Point Jimbo's web-browser to http://www.beards.org/ for inspiration.
• Brainstorm methods of keeping Jimbo's beard away from lawn mowers, industrial strimmers, samurai swords, ceiling fans and razor-sharp wit.