Template:Did you know nominations/Daniel Scott (harbour-master)
- The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Allen3 talk 18:59, 1 September 2013 (UTC)
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Daniel Scott (harbour-master) edit
- ... that Daniel Scott (pictured) invested in a company that paid for Fremantle prisoners to build a tunnel beneath their prison giving easy access to the High St. and the beach?
- Reviewed: Proboscidea louisianica
Created by Victuallers (talk). Self nominated at 22:58, 24 August 2013 (UTC).
Size, citations, time, copyvio OK. Problem is that the source doesn't say that the tunnel ran under the Round House, only that it connected the beach to the High Street. The photo appears to show the tunnel and Round House, but is that really it? Furthermore it is not clear that the Round House was the prison mentioned in the source. The article needs to be tweaked to clarify these issues.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:41, 26 August 2013 (UTC)- thanks for the review. Useful as I was convinced by the photograph. However I also found that page 45 of the source shows the tunnel going underneath the round building and the intro to the source makes it clear that the round house was the prison. (There was no other prison until 1850 and Daniel supplied the building). Happy to take a good alt if you have one.Victuallers (talk) 16:47, 27 August 2013 (UTC)
- That's better, but don't forget to combine cites 6 and 7. I think I was a bit confused between the warehouse later built by Scott and used as a prison and the Round House which was far earlier. The only issue that I have the hook is that it makes it seem as if the prisoners tunneled down from their prison.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:28, 30 August 2013 (UTC)
- ALT1: ... that Daniel Scott (pictured) was an investor in a company that paid for Fremantle prisoners to build a tunnel giving easy access to the High St. and the beach that ran beneath their prison? This is slightly wordier, but gets the point across better, IMO. Good to go.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:28, 30 August 2013 (UTC)
- That's better, but don't forget to combine cites 6 and 7. I think I was a bit confused between the warehouse later built by Scott and used as a prison and the Round House which was far earlier. The only issue that I have the hook is that it makes it seem as if the prisoners tunneled down from their prison.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:28, 30 August 2013 (UTC)
- thanks for the review. Useful as I was convinced by the photograph. However I also found that page 45 of the source shows the tunnel going underneath the round building and the intro to the source makes it clear that the round house was the prison. (There was no other prison until 1850 and Daniel supplied the building). Happy to take a good alt if you have one.Victuallers (talk) 16:47, 27 August 2013 (UTC)
- Thanks for the DYK tick. I'll see if I can more clearly show that the article refers to two prisons. I'm not keen on alt1 as the hook is written to leave the possibility open that the prisoners "tunnelled down from their prison" in the readers mind. I don't think that hooks should be the article - they are headlines to catch the readers attention. Victuallers (talk) 06:38, 31 August 2013 (UTC)
