Talk:Walter Gilbert (cricketer)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Malleus Fatuorum 21:24, 21 April 2011 (UTC)

Lead

• "... he was associated with Gloucestershire cricket when it was very strong and dominated by the Grace family." I'm really uncomfortable about that "strong"; what does it mean exactly? Why "associated with" rather than "played for"? Was he associated in any other way?

No. Rephrased it slightly. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• ... Gilbert was affected by a declining interest in such teams." Affected in what way?

Financially. Reworded. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• "Following other financial worries which prevented him continuing as an amateur ...". We haven't been told about any financial worries thus far, or indeed any worries at all.

Hopefully this makes more sense now. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• "... he was caught stealing from a team-mate in a minor match". The text seems to say that he was going through the clothing of more than one team member, so is the singular "team-mate" correct here?

Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• "He died aged 70 in 1924, but for years around his death, there seemed to be a conspiracy of silence over his fate." I can't quite parse this. The silence went on for years after his death, up until the '70s and '80s apparently, so why "years around his death"?

Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

Achieving prominence

• "None of the matches were first-class, but Gilbert had a string of single-figure scores and a highest score of 33 not out." This is somewhat jarring as an apparent non sequitor. Is it being suggested that Grace selected Gilbert despite his stats being what they were?

It was supposed to suggest that even though the cricket was not of the highest standard, his record was still poor. However, I agree it doesn't really work, so I've changed it, and relegated the not first-class part to a note. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

Decline and disgrace

• "One particular problem which faced Gilbert was financial difficulty." Difficulty isn't a problem, this needs rewording.

Done, I think. Hopefully, the change I've made does not obscure that amateurs were not paid. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• "Yet unlike the Grace brothers, Gilbert did not have a profession outside cricket to provide an income." This begs the obvious question of how he had supported himself until he turned professional.

Good question, to which I have no certain answer. Amateurs were usually paid through slightly devious means to avoid charges of being paid, and I'd imagine this is how. But he would probably have not got much in the way of "expenses" as he was not as big a draw as someone like Grace, so it's possible he was just sinking further and further into trouble. I've added a sentence about amateur "back-handers".--Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

• "Gilbert was in Police Court while the match was taking place, charged with theft. He admitted the charges ...". There's only one charge listed here, theft.

Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

Final years

• "He continued to play cricket, scoring hundreds and becoming one of Canada's leading cricketers. Gilbert died in Calgary on 24 April 1924, aged 70." That "scoring hundreds" reads very strangely to me. Malleus Fatuorum 21:50, 22 April 2011 (UTC)

Yes, and there's no actual need for it. Removed. --Sarastro1 (talk) 19:20, 23 April 2011 (UTC)

Malleus Fatuorum 21:06, 22 April 2011 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.