Talk:Tunicate/GA1
Latest comment: 11 years ago by Cwmhiraeth in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Jens Lallensack (talk · contribs) 11:43, 21 September 2013 (UTC)
I'm glad to review this article. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 11:43, 21 September 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for taking on the review. I look forward to your comments. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:26, 21 September 2013 (UTC)
Unfortunately I will not be able to complete the review before the weekend … but here is the major part. All in all, I think it is a very accurate article. The only weakness I can see is comprehensibility – the layperson may will have problems to follow. Most commens below aim to improve comprehensibility, though this is not needed for reaching GA. I hope that they help, if not, please ignore them.
Lead:
- the lead could be expanded a bit. It should be an abstract of the whole article. How many species? In with deapts do they live? You could also shortly introduce the tree main groups. This sentence may also be suitable for the lead: "Tunicates begin life in a mobile larval stage that resembles a tadpole."
- the first sentence of the lead may is to technical. What about starting with something like "Tunicates (Subphylum Tunicata, previously known as Urochordata) are a subphylum of marine animals.", and removing the taxa Protochordata and Cephalochordata?
- could you provide an in-text explanation for "siphon"? The wikilink is not helpful, as the disambiguation page does not explain anything.
- What does the name Tunicate mean (etymology)? (ok, this info can be found in the section "body structure", but when you look up the article for only this information, you will not find it. It is derived from the greek?).
Anatomy:
- There are about 2,150 species of tunicate in the world's oceans, with fewer than 100 species of ascidians (by far the largest group) being found at depths greater than 200 metres (660 ft). – here you start with subgroup specific information. Other articles of marine invertebrate groups start with the taxonomy section, not with anatomy. The advantage of this is that subgroups can be introduced before the other sections describe subgroup specific characteristics. I find this sentence a bit difficult to understand. What about "There are about 2,150 species of tunicate in the world's oceans, but only a minority of fewer than 100 species can be found at depths greater than 200 meters". This leaves out some detail, but fulfils the purpose of that sentence. Its in the anatomy section, so details that are not related to anatomy should be moved to their proper sections.
- You could try to improve readability by providing some in-text explanations for technical terms, so that the reader do not have to click on every wikilink. For example: the zooids are widely separated but linked together by a stolon -> "the individual animals (zooids) are widely separated but linked together by horizontal connections, called the stolon".
- Done, in part anyway. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:21, 28 September 2013 (UTC)
- The most advanced colonies involve the integration of the zooids into a common structure surrounded by the tunic – what does it mean, the "tunic"? This word appears for the first time, but has neither an explanation nor a wikilik.
- Explained. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:21, 28 September 2013 (UTC)
- buccal siphons and a single central atrial siphon – could you at least provide wikilinks for the technical terms?
- No suitable wikilink available. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:21, 28 September 2013 (UTC)
- A large pharynx occupies most of the interior of the body. – what is the "pharynx"?
- Explained. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:21, 28 September 2013 (UTC)
- with a ciliated groove known as an endostyle on its ventral surface. – I can not picture it for myself. What does this groove, why is this important? Does it pump the water through the animal?
- There are tree sentences starting with "This is" in the first paragraph of "body structure".
- This is criss-crossed by various mesenteries which provide support for the pharynx – readers may have difficulties here to understand what "mesenteries" means because the article Mesentery is about human anatomy.
- What about adding a picture of a free swimming tunicate, for example this one?
- As members of the Chordata they are true Coelomata with endoderm, ectoderm and mesoderm -> perhaps "As members of the Chordata they are true Coelomata with tree primary tissue layers, the endoderm, ectoderm and mesoderm"?
- and there are several types of corpuscle. – Why not "and there are several types of blood cells"? The linked article does not really explain what a "corpuscle" is.
- but the gut, pharynx, gills, gonads and nervous system seem to be arranged in series rather than in parallel as happens in most other animals – I do not really understand this. What does "in series" and "in parallel" means in this context?
- What about muscles and movement? The article says in the feeding section that sessile tunicates can orientate themselves according to the stream direction. Where are the muscles? Are these animals able to close their siphons?
Life cycle:
- please explain what a "gonozooid" is. The gonozooid is hermaphrodite and the eggs are fertilised by sperm from another individual. -> perhaps "The gonozooid, the adult stage, …" or "the final stage"?
Taxonomy:
- Urochordata is a junior synonym of Tunicata which was established by Lamarck in 1816. – I'm not good in english, but this prose may be unclear. Which was established by Lamarck, the Urochordata or the Tunicata? What about starting the whole paragraph like this: "The Tunicata was established by Lamarck in 1816. In 1881, Balfour introduced a second name for the same grop, Urochorda, to emphasize the affinity of the group to other chordates."
- Various species are commonly known as sea tulips, sea squirts[18] or sea pork.[19] – when running a Wikipedia search for these common names, you are redirected to this article. But the article does not explain these terms: How does a sea pork look like, and what species from which groups are covered by this name? The reader will not get an idea what a sea pork is and how it differs from a sea tulip. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 04:59, 24 September 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for these comments which I will be working to address over the course of the next few days. I will particularly try to include some explanations for the technical terms where the wikilinks are unhelpful. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:08, 24 September 2013 (UTC)
- Looks really great now. I have reviewed the rest of the article but found no further issues. As the last four unaddressed issues are imo minor and not nessessary for a GA, I will pass it now. Thank you for all your work on this article, qualitative articles on the major invertebrate groups are utterly important. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 17:17, 1 October 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you for your review. I have been busy and was going to come back to the article this evening to deal with the remaining items. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:20, 1 October 2013 (UTC)
- Looks really great now. I have reviewed the rest of the article but found no further issues. As the last four unaddressed issues are imo minor and not nessessary for a GA, I will pass it now. Thank you for all your work on this article, qualitative articles on the major invertebrate groups are utterly important. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 17:17, 1 October 2013 (UTC)