Talk:The Shire/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Hog Farm in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 16:23, 10 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

I'll get to this one in the next couple days. Hog Farm (talk) 16:23, 10 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Many thanks for taking this on. Looking forward to it. Chiswick Chap (talk) 16:44, 10 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Criteria

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1. Prose  Pass

2. Verifiability  Pass

3. Depth of Coverage  Pass

4. Neutral  Pass

5. Stable  Pass

6. Illustrations  Pass

7. Miscellaneous  Pass

Comments

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1.

  • " and largely removed" --> "and is largely removed" I believe
Said "sheltered", Tolkien's own word for this.
  • Is it Hobbits or hobbits? I've seen both, and I don't really know if it's suppose to be capitalized or not.
Tolkien changed his mind on this one. I think best is we use The Hobbit when it's the title and "hobbit(s)" everywhere else.
  • Likewise, it is "The Shire" or "the Shire"? I've seen both, and both are used in the article.
Lower case it is.
  • "The landscape included Downland and woods" - I don't think downland should be capitalized
Fixed.
  • There's some circular links in this article. I'll try to keep a list, but please go ahead and check yourself in case I miss any. It's just superfluous and a little misleading to have links in the article that just go to the same section or the top of the article, as opposed to those that provide interarticle navigation in long articles.
Removed the residual #links.
  • Baranduin (piped link to Brandywine)
Done.
  • Tower Hills
Done.
  • The Bag End link in one of the captions.
Done
  • King's Reckoning in the calendar section
Done.
  • Thain is a name list. I think you intended to link to Thain (Middle-earth), but that's just a circular link back to this article, so I wouldn't recommend using that as a link either.
Removed.
Done.
  • "The protagonists of The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings, Bilbo and Frodo Baggins lived at Bag End," - I believe this should have a comma between Baggins and lived.
Done.
Done.
  • Frodo is duplinked
Done.
  • Dwarves is a duplink
Done.
Done.
  • Third Age is a duplink
Done.
Done.
  • Nice collapsing calendar table. I didn't realize that was there when I nominated all of the month names at RFD.
Thanks!
  • "270 years from Battle of Sedgemoor to Lord of the Rings" Maybe throw in is that it's to the date of the publishment of the book
Done.

2.

  • COPYVIO check clean, only brought up a mirror.
Thank goodness.
  • The capital in the infobox needs cited.
Done.
  • Also, it probably shouldn't be linked, because it's to a broken section within the same article
Removed.

Refs

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  • Ref 17 is to Shippey (2007). There's no 2007 work by Shippey in the bibliography
Not sure what happened there. Reworded and reffed to Shippey 2005, and Tolkien's own Foreword.
  • Refs 21, 23, 25, 26, and 27 need accessdates.
Added.
  • Ref 20 needs a publisher. Also, is "onering.net" a reliable source? I'm not familiar with it.
Removed.
  • Ref 22 needs the author.
Removed.
  • Ref 24 doesn't seem to point to the right content.
Removed uncited.
  • Ref 27 doesn't point to the right content.
Removed uncited.

More

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3.

  • I'm surprised you don't mention the Mayor of the Shire in the government section. It's mentioned several times in Tolkien's writings, seems to have exercised authority too. Sam was elected to it a million times. It's in the infobox, but it's probably worth putting in the main text.
Done.
  • Might be worth mentioning the Thain in the government section too; it's explained in the history section, so not much of a mention would be necessary.
Done.

4.

5.

6.

  • It's unfortunate that that's probably the only Shire map we can have licensed to put in the article. The caption says that some locations are "conjectural", and lo and behold, there's stuff on the map that's not present on Tolkien's map of the Shire in my copy of LOTR. I don't like the idea of a map containing OR, but there may not be an alternative.
Yes, I was thinking of redrawing it; it's a bit of a lurid green and it ought to be a vector SVG rather than an unscaleable raster image. A thankless task and no part of GAN but I might do it all the same.

7.

Placing on hold, there's some ref work to do and some wikilinks to scour. Hog Farm (talk) 23:17, 11 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

All done to date (including the SVG). Chiswick Chap (talk) 14:20, 12 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
Passing now. The Shire map image isn't ideal, but it's the best available at the moment. Hog Farm (talk) 18:28, 12 April 2020 (UTC)Reply