Talk:The Playboy/GA1

Latest comment: 9 years ago by Resolute in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Resolute (talk · contribs) 00:26, 25 April 2015 (UTC)Reply


GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, no copyvios, spelling and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  
General
Background
  • Stylistic complaint only, but I am not a big fan of putting cites in the middle of sentences where there is no punctuation break. i.e.: "He moved to Toronto and discovered underground comix[3] and the small-press community." Does cite 3 support the entire sentence, and could it not be moved to the end of it?
Style and analysis
  • "Brown had grown dissatisfied with his drawing style and had been simplifying since bringing Ed the Happy Clown to an end, as he had been reading work by cartoonists with simple styles such as John Stanley and Brown's friend Seth." - this feels like a run-on sentence. Is there a way to break it in two?
  • "Darcy Sullivan sees Brown in this scene having "shunted aside his painful feelings for her, and for other women, in favor of this tatty fetish"." - Sullivan has not been introduced at this point, so I had no idea who he was; a character in the story or a real world person. Perhaps note here that he is a literary critic.
  • "...Joe Matt's less-subtle work,..." - What was the title of Matt's work?
Publication
  • Not a complaint about this article and doesn't need to be changed, but I think you might have unintentionally added some commentary on modern society and communication. I literally laughed out loud at the fact you felt the need to add mouseover text for "#" to explain this means "number".
  • "...Brown switched publishers to the Montreal-based Drawn and Quarterly .[6] who published the collected edition of..." - Either a stray period before the citation, or an improperly constructed start to a sentence.
Overall

Unsurprisingly, this article is pretty much already on the cusp of GA quality. Just a couple small nitpicks above, for which I will place the article on hold for the moment. Cheers! Resolute 00:26, 25 April 2015 (UTC)Reply