Talk:Smith Gun/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Lede

• "ad hoc" - either link to ad hoc, or replace with makeshift, I'd say. We're writing for the lowest common denominator here.
• "With a German invasion of Great Britain seeming likely after the defeat in the Battle of France most available weaponry was diverted to the regular British Army" - comma after "Battle of France" please.
• "The Smith Gun was designed by a retired Army Major named William H. Smith and was put into production in 1941 following a demonstration to the Prime Minister, Winston Churchill." - perhaps include designed as a makeshift device/stopgap/something for the Home Guard to link it to the previous sentence?

Development

• "Given these shortcomings, those modern weapons that were available were allocated to the British Army," - same as with Sticky Bomb, "those remaining anti-tank weapons"?
• 'unorthodox' needs to be in full quotation marks and referenced with an inline cite, please.
• "The weapon design was submitted to the Ordnance Board, who were unconvinced with its merits" - of, not with. Or better "were not convinced of its merits".

Design

• "3 inch calibre smoothbore barrel,[2] 54 inches in length,[6]" - reads awkwardly with that extra comma. Suggest "3 inch calibre smoothbore barrel 54 inches in length,[2][6]"
• "both anti-personnel or anti-tank rounds" - either "both anti-personnel and anti-tank rounds" or "either anti-personnel or anti-tank rounds".
• "The weapon was found to have several flaws in its design, and as such was not well-liked by some of the Home Guard units that it was issued to." - inline cite please

Operational history

• "Production on the Smith Guns began in late 1941, but problems with their production" - awkward. Possibly "the Smith Guns began to be manufactured in late 1941, but production problems.." although that isn't much better.
• "Production problems also affected the ammunition for the weapons; a delay in producing anti-tank ammunition meant that each weapon was only supplied with six or seven rounds." - awkward, repetition - suggest just "Production problems also affected the ammunition for the weapons; a delay in manufacturing anti-tank ammunition meant that each weapon was only supplied with six or seven rounds.
• "simple, powerful and accurate weapon which, if properly handled, will add greatly to the firepower of the Home Guard." - inline cite.

• That's all. Ironholds (talk) 02:52, 14 September 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for the review. That should all be done now; the only problem I had was with the first Development section point; the text in this article is the same as at Sticky bomb, but I've rewritten it slightly, so hopefully it makes sense now. Skinny87 (talk) 16:41, 14 September 2009 (UTC)