Talk:James T. Butts Jr./GA1

Latest comment: 9 years ago by CorporateM in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: SNUGGUMS (talk · contribs) 00:28, 3 December 2014 (UTC)Reply


Infobox
  • The URL used for FN1 (California Birth Index) doesn't say anything on Butts
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:01, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
Lead
  • If the article's subject is known as "James T. Butts, Jr.", why is there nothing for "T" or even the initial itself in the opening sentence?
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:02, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • While citations are generally not needed in the lead section per WP:LEADCITE, I will say that FN2 (City of Inglewood) also doesn't support his birth date
I don't see where citation 2 is used to verify his birthdate. It's used in the Lede to verify his education. CorporateM (Talk) 14:03, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
Law enforcements career
  • "He held that position until 2006"..... try served as chief
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:04, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "in that position" from "Early in his tenure in that position" isn't really needed
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:06, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "since those arrested wouldn't be prosecuted"..... avoid contractions unless part of a quote or title
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:07, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "he said the city's infrastructure and economy had decayed"..... not sure if "decayed" is the best word choice
How about "deteriorated"? CorporateM (Talk) 14:07, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
Mayor
  • Add a comma after "According to the Los Angeles Business Journal"
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:08, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • I'm skeptical about the tone of "For example" (which is used twice)
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:09, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "Butts worked Lakers games"..... something's not right here- one can't "work" a game
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:10, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
References
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:12, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:12, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Is "Sports on Earth" a reliable source?
Not sure. It looks like a pretty in-depth professional piece, but I can't find more information on the author. CorporateM (Talk) 14:21, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • The link to "Los Angeles Wave" is dead, and I'm not sure it's a reliable source
According to their about page, it's a 100 year-old local newspaper with 1.8 million readers and the largest local weekly in the area. Seems like exactly the type of local source you'd expect for a local politician. CorporateM (Talk) 14:30, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:21, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:25, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN's 7, 9, 17, and 19 need to have accessdates
  Done CorporateM (Talk) 14:25, 5 December 2014 (UTC)Reply
Overall
  • Well-written?:   Decent, but could be better
  • Verifiable?:   Not entirely
  • Broad in Coverage?:   There is nothing on the subject's early life, his family, or how he became interested in pursuing his careers.
  • Neutral?:   Looks good
  • Stable?:   Nothing of concern
  • Illustrated, if possible, by images?:   The one image used is relevant, appropriately licensed, and has a suitable caption
  • Pass or Fail?:   The article is not complete and needs considerable expansion, so I am failing this. Do more research before renominating.