Talk:Hide (Doctor Who)/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by Lemonade51 in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Lemonade51 (talk · contribs) 16:27, 4 December 2013 (UTC)Reply

I'll review this.

  • "...he had been a fan of the show, but had never had the time to write an episode" and “Writer Neil Cross was a Doctor Who fan, but had never had the time to write an episode.”, Hmmm, suggest you tweak the tenses as it can imply he used to be Doctor Who fan, but isn’t now.
  • Nice job with the lead.
Whoops, I meant plot here! :o I've fixed the Cross bits to avoid close paraphrasing.
  • "he did fly in with his family to watch it being filmed" → "However, he flew in with his family to watch the filming", to avoid noun plus -ing.
  • Done. Glimmer721 talk 16:58, 6 December 2013 (UTC)Reply
  • ” Cross only had Coleman's five-minute audition for "Asylum of the Daleks" - in which she played a different but mysteriously linked character — to work from”, incorrect usage of dashes here.
  • Do you mean the actual dashes themselves (on is nbsp and the other isn't), or do you mean there shouldn't be any at all? Glimmer721 talk 16:58, 6 December 2013 (UTC)Reply
I don't see why commas can't be used here; have removed the dashes.
Have tweaked the references for you.

No dabs or dead links; two images have sufficient licenses. Shall pass once comments have been addressed, on hold for seven days. Lemonade51 (talk) 16:27, 4 December 2013 (UTC)Reply

I have fixed some things and left clarification comments on the others to make sure I'm doing the right thing. Thanks for the review! Glimmer721 talk 16:58, 6 December 2013 (UTC)Reply
Happy with the changes, am going to pass. Lemonade51 (talk) 16:56, 7 December 2013 (UTC)Reply