Talk:Harrison West Neighborhood

Latest comment: 9 years ago by Kowalski.118 in topic 2nd draft

Peer Comments

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History

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The Harrison West Society

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1st paragraph: "for quotations within quotations, use double quote marks outermost and, working inward, alternate single with double quote marks." -- Wikipedia Manual of Style

bullet points: "protect our residential areas and bolster our commercial strip." Incorrect writing perspective - use "their" instead of "our"

This section seems to promote the Harrison West Society from a biased perspective. Would benefit from a more objective point of view

Geography

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Citation required

Structures and Landmarks

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"boasts two cafes with wi-fi connections, so you can enjoy our neighborhood over your favorite drink and sandwich."

Use of opinionated language, use of "you" and "your"

Entertainment

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"excellent place for any type of recreation"

Use of opinionated language

Education

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"even that of Ohio"

use of "even" is unnecessary, implies bias

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Integrate images into article

References

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Sources must be reformatted to appear here. Use inline citations.

Additional Comments

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Article is well organized. It could benefit from fewer direct quotations - these make the article seem biased towards the opinion of the source material. The Article could integrate more images within the text. The lead paragraph is concise and well-written.

-- Steven.bow.13 (talk) 23:57, 3 December 2014 (UTC)Reply

Instructor Comments

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Well-written

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  • Refer to the manual of style guidelines which emphasis on writing style

Verifiable with no original research

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  • References need to be formatted properly.
  • You over use quotations. They should only be used in specific instances.
  • GoodVibes is not a reputable reference. Please Use US Census Data.

Broad in its coverage

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  • Wanting more detail on Parks,
  • Info on outside attractions is good.
  • Need more info on neighborhood attractions (I know that there are several bar/restaurants in the area that are notable).
  • Article does a good job of staying focused, but it very narrow in approach.

Neutral

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  • You need to edit out the commentary. This is VERY important.

Stable

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  • If you follow the above four items, you article will be.

Illustrated

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  • Move images from gallery into main space of the article.
  • Provide captions for those.
  • Good use of place infobox, but insert a image that is representative of the neighborhood and take photos yourself.

Kenitzer.1 (talk) 14:36, 4 December 2014 (UTC)Reply

2nd draft

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Notes from class editor: You don't need to say how far away everything is in terms of walking vs. driving. You should link to the pages of the Arena District and Short North when talking about those places. We also don't need to know what percentage of Columbus's total population lives in Harrison West. Kowalski.118 (talk) 13:10, 9 December 2014 (UTC)Reply