Talk:Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Wingwatchers (talk · contribs) 19:16, 9 October 2023 (UTC)

I will review this article shortly.Wingwatchers (talk) 19:16, 9 October 2023 (UTC)

Lead

@Hoopderscotch:

• Change "who he was and why he died." to his identify and the cause of his death
  • Done.
• Removed "Direction, writing, and game design were headed by Shu Takumi, creator of the Ace Attorney franchise." from lead. The lead would flow much better without this sentence, and the only real contextual basis here is development head by Attorney and we do not care if he directed Ace Attorney because this is outside the scope of this context.
  • Done.
• Change "Players" to the player, and also do that in subsequent mentions of it; the former is generally discouraged
  • Done.
• Removed ". Gameplay is split into two sections: gathering information by navigating through the city, and saving lives by traveling back in time." unnecessary
  • Done.
• Change "Ghost Trick was positively received, with praise for its characters, art direction, animation, music, and story, while some criticized its puzzle design and traversal mechanics." to "Ghost Trick was positively received; critics praise its characters, art direction, animation, music, and story, and they criticized its puzzle design and traversal mechanics." "Some" is considered weasel words and is generally discouraged.
  • Done.
• Despite its reception, Ghost Trick was a commercial failure in Japan, leading Capcom to cite its performance as a cause for lackluster Q1 2010 revenue. There are no real connection between a games' reception and its commercial success.
• "Despite its reception, Ghost Trick was a commercial failure in Japan, leading Capcom to cite its performance as a cause for lackluster Q1 2010 revenue" Justify why it is necessary.
  • Removed "Despite its reception" so the sentence stands on its own.
• The game was nominated for several industry awards, including Game of the Year by GameSpot and Nintendo Power, and has since garnered a cult following. Again I see no connection between its awards and the formation of a cult; maybe you can change it to "The game was nominated for several industry awards, including Game of the Year by GameSpot and Nintendo Power, and it garnered a cult following." I understand exceptions can be made if you are trying to express that the former influenced the latter.
  • Done.
• "The game was formally announced at TGS 2009" Removed formally unless the game was somehow "unformally" released to justify it use
  • The game was teased in a magazine interview before its announcement at TGS 2009, so I put "formally" to avoid confusion, but I do agree that using the official announcement would make more sense.
• " An enhanced iOS port released in Japan in December 2010, and internationally in February 2012. An Android port was released exclusively on the Japanese game distribution platform G-Gee in November 2012." I am not sure anyone would find this appealing and/or relevant.
  • Should I remove this entirely or reword it? I referenced several good articles while editing this, and almost all of them included every instance of a game's release in the lead.

The first GA nomination concerns include gameplay inaccuracies, original research, and excessive quote uses. @Hoopderscotch: Have and how did you address these? Wingwatchers (talk) 22:31, 11 October 2023 (UTC)

I have, yes! I apologize for not listing all the changes I made under the initial GA review page, it was the first time I'd nominated anything. The Gameplay section has been fully and accurately sourced, the instance of original research was removed, and the Reception section was completely rewritten. — hoopder^® 12:09, 12 October 2023 (UTC)

Some of the prose and source might not be be professional but meet GA standard.