Talk:Garde Church/GA1
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
GA Review
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Reviewer: Vami IV (talk · contribs) 20:18, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Opening statement
editIn reviews I conduct, I may make small copyedits. These will only be limited to spelling and punctuation (removal of double spaces and such). I will only make substantive edits that change the flow and structure of the prose if I previously suggested and it is necessary. For replying to Reviewer comment, please use Done, Fixed, Added, Not done, Doing..., or Removed, followed by any comment you'd like to make. I will be crossing out my comments as they are redressed, and only mine. A detailed, section-by-section review will follow. —♠Vami_IV†♠ 20:18, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
I'll leave this article On-Hold until Lye Church's review is completed :). –♠Vami_IV†♠ 20:18, 3 April 2020 (UTC)
Prose
editThe oldest part is the nave and the base of the tower, while the youngest part is the large chancel.
"Youngest" is not how I would describe age in an inanimate object.
The church contains wall paintings from c. 1200 in Russo-Byzantine style, almost unique in Sweden.
How is something "almost unique"?
- Fixed I changed it to "unique" only. There are a few fragments of other Russo-Byzantine paintings in one or two other churches on Gotland, that's why I wanted to qualify it. But reflecting on it, I think for all intents and purposes, the murals in Garde can reasonably be described as unique. Yakikaki (talk) 09:58, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
built, probably
Everything highlighted here after "built" can be removed without loss in quality.
lychgates or entrances
Link lychgates again and axe "or entrances".
The main entrance
Main gate, following the previous bullet-point.
The two storeys above have been used as a granary for storing the church tithe for a long time. The last time the lychgate was used as a granary was in 1917.
Combine and reduce.
- Fixed Yakikaki (talk) 09:58, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
The lychgate, one of the largest medieval lychgates in Sweden, probably dates from the first half of the 13th century.
Move to the beginning of the description of this lychgate, combine with the first sentence, and reduce.
The present church at Lye
It is also possibly that the roof trusses of the present church originally comes from a presumed earlier wooden church.
There are a couple grammar hiccups here.
It is also possible that the roof trusses of the church comes from
Change "comes from" to "came from".
It was probably built during the middle of the 12th century, perhaps begun around 1130.
Just use the latter. It is better to be specifically vague than vaguely vague.
The baptismal font and triumphal cross still in the church are from the time
same time.
"During the" is used to start a sentence twice in a row in "History".
the tower was heightened to its current height [...] the earlier chancel was also replaced by the current, disproportionately large chancel and sacristy.
Delete the "also" here; the tower wasn't replaced. Replacing "heightened" with "raised" would also make the first part read better.
Probably the intention
"Probably" should be the third word here.
during which probably the last remaining medieval stained glass windows disappeared.
They can't be remaining if they've disappeared.
Another renovation was done in 2004
Do you have anything to add to make this renovation stand out?
The entire church is whitewashed, except the portals, the corners of the chancel, nave and tower, and the plinths of the tower and the chancel
Axe "entire".
these are all of more carefully hewn limestone
Missing a "the".
are simple, round arches Romanesque portals
Consider "simple, round, Romanesque portals"
- Fixed I axed "round" since it's implied as they're Romanesque and also visible in the picture. Yakikaki (talk) 11:30, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
now vanished, first chancel
Remove the comma here.
rebuilt during the 14th century
Replace "during" with "in".
The southern portal of the chancel is in contrast a decorated Gothic portal.
Reword this.
- Fixed Settled for "The southern portal of the chancel is Gothic in style" Yakikaki (talk) 11:30, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
The capitals are decorated with plant ornaments with faint traces of original paint;[17] once the entire portal was probably painted.
Delete the text after the semicolon.
The wimperg above the portal
A tympanum?
also found e.g. in
The "e.g." here is unnecessary.
The bell was according to an inscription upon it made
Put in a comma before "was" and after "it".
The nave gets its light from highly placed, small windows
Reword.
while the larger chancel gets its light from large Gothic windows in the eastern and southern walls.
Consider "the large Gothic windows in".
The floor of the church largely date from
Should be "dates".
served as a church tabernacle,
Remove "church", it's redundant.
which also contains decorations from the 14th century inside.
Remove "inside", ditto.
No original stained glass remains in the church, though the chancel windows still contained medieval stained glass panes as late as the 1860s.
Shorten.
The entire nave was probably originally decorated with mural paintings. The majority of these are either entirely lost, or survive only in fragments on the walls of the nave.
Shorten.
These are Russo-Byzantine in style, [...] They are almost unique in Sweden.
...Are there other examples in Sweden?It has been suggested that there is a relationship with fragmentary paintings in Källunge and Havdhem churhes, but otherwise no comparative paintings exist in Sweden.
Ah. Oh, and "comparative" should be "comparable".
- Fixed I removed the "unique" sentence since it's implied in the following text, as you note above. Yakikaki (talk) 12:45, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
One set of murals are however still very well preserved, [...] They have never been covered and are recognised as being of high quality;
Combine.
Lye Church and Burs Church [...] Källunge and Havdhem churches
Make these consistent.
determine the origins of artist
an artist or workshop known by the notname Byzantios, who made several Romanesque baptismal fonts influenced by Byzantine art on Gotland.
Seems there was more than one Orthodox-inspired artist active on Gotland. If this was common, it's worth bringing up in the discussion about the Russo-Byzantine mural.
- Probably not; even Western art at this time was Byzantine-esque. But I cut out everything after Byzantios since it perhaps serves more to confuse than to elucidate here. There's a discussion about possible influences in the style of Byzantios at that wiki-page. Yakikaki (talk) 12:45, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
probably made around 1200 [...] probably from the 18th century
Try a "likely" in the latter example here instead of "probably".
Lye Church is an
GA progress
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