Talk:Dyrham Park/GA1

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Cwmhiraeth in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Cwmhiraeth (talk · contribs) 06:13, 28 August 2016 (UTC)Reply


First reading

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In general this article looks fine, but there are some tweaks needed in the first half, the second half being better!

  • "The first lord of the manor to be resident my have been William Denys" - typo
  • "Esquire of the Body to the king" - Which king?
  • "The estate was bought by by William Blathwayt," - two "by"s, and do you know the date for the purchase?
  • "by from the terrace to the grounds." - Error.
  • "The east front of 1704 from William Talman, architect of Chatsworth." - No verb in this sentence.
  • "The gardens were designed by George London in the late 17th and early 18th centuries." - This sentence is out of place, sandwiched between information on the house interior, and should be moved.
  • "While this was underway visitors could view the house from a rooftop walkway." --> "While the repairs were in progress, visitors could view the house from a rooftop walkway."
  • "fronted by an Italianate double staircase." - I'm not sure about this, it doesn't seem to be in the source, and "fronted by" sounds as if it is external to the building. The Historic England sources are very difficult to interpret.
  • You move straight from a description of the exterior to the contents of the house. It would be nice to have a bit about the interior, but I am not demanding this as there is no requirement for a GA to be comprehensive.
  • In the caption for the image of the royal licence, "affixed thereto" is a bit archaic.