Talk:David Hudson (pioneer)/GA1
Latest comment: 9 years ago by Coemgenus in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Coemgenus (talk · contribs) 13:33, 9 December 2014 (UTC)
I'll get started on this review over the next few days. --Coemgenus (talk) 13:33, 9 December 2014 (UTC)
Chart
edit- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail:
Comments
edit- Lede
- The last sentence is kind of just hanging out there. It would be better to make the lede into one big paragraph or two smaller ones.
- I split more off the first paragraph and put it on the second, if it looks all right. If you think it might be better to have it all as one paragraph, I'm fine with that - just thought it's best to have two. ~SuperHamster Talk Contribs 05:10, 11 December 2014 (UTC)
- Two is fine. --Coemgenus (talk) 02:11, 12 December 2014 (UTC)
- Early life
- "Hudson's claim that his property was "spent" at the hands of the British is also doubted." might be better in active voice. Perhaps "Historians [or whoever] also doubt Hudson's claim that his property was "spent" at the hands of the British."
- Religion
- "His father practiced Calvinistic Presbyterian Christianity" is kind of repetitive. I think "His father was a Presbyterian" or "His father practiced Presbyterianism" might be better.
- Travel
- Is the William McKinley mentioned the father of the president of the same name?
- Again, the paragraphs are kind of out of balance. Maybe break up the first one and combine with the second?
- Post-establishment and Death
- The last three short paragraphs should probably be expanded, or else combined in a single paragraph.
- References
- What's with the "1952?". Does the book not have a clear publication date?
- Images