Talk:Antonio Dini/GA1

Latest comment: 1 year ago by Pickersgill-Cunliffe in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 17:20, 25 April 2023 (UTC)Reply

I'll take a look at this shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 17:20, 25 April 2023 (UTC)Reply

Prelim

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  • No duplicated links
  • Earwig reports copyvio unlikely
  • No edit wars

Lede and infobox

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  • "Dini joined the RAF in 1938"
  • Service number, from CWGC, can be added to infobox (and cited there)
  • Place of burial, as Hawkinge Cemetery, could be added to infobox
  • Why not include Dini's other unit(s)?

Royal Air Force

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  • Hatfield Aerodrome is capitalised as such in its article?
  • The article doesn't make clear that Uxbridge is an RAF base, one has to read the linked article to discover that it's not just Uxbridge. Also, you use "RAF Ford" later on but only "Uxbridge" here.
  • Suggest adding that the FAA was part of the Royal Navy, for the historically challenged among readers
  • Would be nice to have at least one more date in between December 1937 and January 1939
  • I know this is unlikely, but any reason behind the secondment? Seems strange for a new RAF pilot especially
  • "He was subsequently assigned" a date here would make the subsequent "Later in the year" less ambigious
  • "assigned to the RAF's School of Naval Co-operation" does this mean he was training there or just flying from the same place as the school?
  • It is not entirely clear. You will see I have revised this a little - he went to 751 Squadron and reviewing the article for that unit, it was involved in training observers. This make me think that he may have been a staff pilot, by this stage at least. Regardless, the sources don't specify this. Zawed (talk) 05:14, 29 April 2023 (UTC)Reply

Second World War

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  • Again, a date some time between his injuries and joining his new squadron would be useful to the reader
  • "Dini made three more sorties" to avoid too many "he"s in short succession
  • Interesting that the date of the squadron's withdrawal from France isn't exact?
  • I have changed the date slightly here, the original date was when the ground personnel left France but no exact date is given for flying personnel. The new date is when the squadron began reassembling at Croydon. The source (Rawlings) notes that the squadron's records for the period were lost. Zawed (talk) 05:34, 29 April 2023 (UTC)Reply
  • Suggest explicitly saying what No. 605 was flying; one might assume he was flying a Hurricane up to Scotland because it was what he had previously used rather than what he was to use in the future
  • What's the extra kill that Shores and Williams list? I may have missed one, but right now I'm counting 4 destroyed, 2 shared, 2 damaged, 3 possibles
  • Good catch, turns out I had missed one aerial victory entirely (and put one of the probables on the wrong day). I have revised the description of the engagements in France/Belgium to remedy this. Zawed (talk) 05:34, 29 April 2023 (UTC)Reply

References

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  • References look good. AGF on print sources.

@Zawed: Hi, that's all I have for now. Will await responses. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 20:32, 25 April 2023 (UTC)Reply

@Pickersgill-Cunliffe: Thanks for taking a look at this, I have revised the article in response to your feedback plus replied to some your comments above, please check to see that all is in order. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 05:36, 29 April 2023 (UTC)Reply
@Zawed: Happy with your edits. Passing this as satisfying the GA criteria. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 10:29, 29 April 2023 (UTC)Reply