Talk:2013–14 Vancouver Canucks season/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 21:23, 21 April 2016 (UTC)

I will be reviewing this as part of a GAN sweep. I'll leave some comments soon. JAGUAR  21:23, 21 April 2016 (UTC)

Initial comments

• The lead definitely needs an expansion per WP:LEADLENGTH. Since this article is quite long, I would recommend writing another paragraph to summarise the article
• The December, January, Before Olympics in February, After Olympics in February, March and April sections have no citations. The GA criteria requires every paragraph to be sourced, so any amount of citations implemented in these sections will have to be done in order for this to pass
• The After Olympics in February is very short. Can it be merged into another section?
• The last paragraph in the Canucks players in the Olympics section is also unsourced

I'm placing this on hold as the lead needs to be expanded and all unsourced sections need citations before this can pass. Once that is done, this has a good chance of passing. Overall it's very well written and comprehensive. JAGUAR  16:52, 22 April 2016 (UTC)

@Jaguar: Hey, just wanted to let you know I may need a slight extension on this GA, if that's alright with you. I got minor surgery the other day and should be lying down for the next few days, away from the desktop. Gives me time to finally start Tales of Zersteria :P but won't be able to work on this GA for a few days. I hope that's alright, if not I'll trek through this article tonight.Spilia4 (talk) 02:02, 28 April 2016 (UTC)

Editor's comments/personal updates

Finally getting around to this, sorry for the delay.

• Lead: Wrote a long lead paragraph. I'm not a Canucks fan and I typically only write leads for video games so it may be a little unorthodox, but I did my best.
• December, January, Before Olympics in February, After Olympics in February: Combined sections due to short lengths of all and so I can limit citations.
• Sections December+: Added refs for each subsection.
• Canucks players in the Olympics: Last paragraphed now has a source for the 5-0 defeat vs Finland, meaning US does not get a medal.

GA recommendations have all been accounted for. @Jaguar:, if it's to your liking, we may be done here. Spilia4 (talk) 03:07, 30 April 2016 (UTC)

Thanks for addressing them Spilia4! And sorry for coming to this late as for some reason I didn't get your pings. I hoped the surgery went well. With all of those issues out of the way, this looks good to go. I understand that writing articles on video games and real-life sports must be very different. JAGUAR  13:59, 30 April 2016 (UTC)

Jaguar, I'm seeing prose issues throughout; I don't see how this article meets the "clear and concise" GA criterion. The opening sentence of the newly combined "December through February" section has not only not been updated to reflect the change to the header, but it is not written to GA standards: During this month, the team find them selfs winning 7 straight in the beginning of December after a 6-2 victory over the Boston Bruins. The article prose goes back and forth between present and past tense, the article lead has wikilinks in the bolded text, something absolutely forbidden in WP:LEAD, another GA criterion... I could go on, but all of this should have been caught. Please reverse the approval and resume the review, taking a very close look at the article, since it needs significant work: I'd like to recommend a full Guild of Copy Editors copyedit, since the tense issues are so pervasive. There's also a great deal of informal language used, and two parenthetical comments in the lead, which would also be addressed in a copyedit. Thank you for your consideration. BlueMoonset (talk) 17:20, 30 April 2016 (UTC)

Per BlueMoonset's suggestion, I've placed this article back under review until all of the new issues can be addressed. Before passing this I considered splitting the lead into three paragraphs so it appears more comfortable to read. Spilia4, I'm really sorry to do this, could you see to it that BlueMoonset's concerns are clarified? I'll keep an eye on this, and will promote again once all of the issues have been dealt with. JAGUAR  11:21, 1 May 2016 (UTC)

Actually, I've reversed my decision. This can be addressed if this article is sent to GAR. JAGUAR  21:19, 3 May 2016 (UTC)

Sent to GAR. I think it's a great shame that it has become necessary, but the sheer number of issues make the above reversal not merely unfortunate, but troubling. BlueMoonset (talk) 05:14, 6 May 2016 (UTC)