User:Bibliomaniac15/How many Wikipedians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb? edit
There are several explanations. Add if you've come up with another.
How many Wikipedians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? edit
- Two - same as anywhere else![1]
- See also: The "how many angels?" question
- One, but make sure you have a verifiable reference for the correct wattage.
- ^ Assuming they could fit in the lightbulb.
Uncyclopedia edit
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: ∞. "One to request the process of screwing the lightbulb (not always necessary), one to start the process of screwing the lightbulb, hundreds to continue the process, one to put a template saying that the methodology is wrong, one to put a template saying that the methodology is right, hundreds to revert which template is put on the page, hundreds to vandalize the lightbulb, hundreds to revert the vandals, hundreds to discuss the methodology, four or five to start an edit war, one sysop to ban those involved the edit war, a few hundred more to debate the methodology, two to create userboxes represent one's stance on the methodology, one to complain that the userboxes clutter the template namespace, one sysop to delete the userboxes, one sysop to restore the userboxes, hundreds to flame others over the methodology, hundreds more to think linking to WP:CIVIL counts as a rebuttal, hundreds to.... oh, fuck it."
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: A cast of thousands, but somehow it all works out. Hundreds to hash out a consensus in an RfC on the best lightbulb changing policy. Two to codify the result in WP:LIGHTBULB. Dozens to snark about the new guidelines on IRC. A throng of editors to recommend infrared goggles and X-Ray vision as an alternative to actual lightbulb changing. One admin to retroactively alter WP:LIGHTBULB after Jimbo Wales makes clear his preference for darkness on the mailing list. Three bystanders of varying shades of innocence whose RFAs fall victim to the controversy. Several confused editors to ask on talk pages why all the lights are out. A horde of RC patrollers to make sure no lightbulbs are inserted contrary to policy. An even larger horde of vandals to smash all available lightbulbs to tiny pieces. One Signpost writer to summarize the week's events. And one anonymous user to actually change the bulb.
Q: How many Uncyclopedians does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: 12. One to notice the frantic debates in Wikipedia to change the lightbulb and create a parody, and 10 more to fill the parody with profanities, patent nonsense, funny images and templates, and off-color humor. And another to change the lightbulb as an IP in Wikipedia.
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to Change a Light Bulb?
- A:
- 1 User to start the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Changing_a_Light_Bulb article.
- 1 editor immediately deletes the article because it is auto-biographical.
- 1 "anonymous" user to start the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Changing_a_Light_Bulb article (We don't count him - since he is of course the original user).
- 1 editor to tag it with the "No original research" template (Without giving a reason).
- 1 editor to claim the article is nonsense (Without giving a reason).
- 1 editor to claim this content is commercial (Without giving a reason).
- 1 editor to claim it violates the wikipedia "Neutral Point of View policy" (Without giving a reason).
- The original user to ask why the editors thinks this way on the talk page.
- 10 editors to note that the original user forgot to sign his statement, but without answering the question posed.
- 1 user to delete all links.
- 1 user to delete anything remotely interesting, because it violates the wikipedia "Neutral Point of View policy" (Without giving a reason).
- 1 editor to revert it.
- 1 editor to revert it back.
- 1 editor to revert the revert and delete a little more of the original content.
- 10 users to rant in the talk page that Changing a light bulb is not notable enough.
- 1 Person to argue that the article should be merged into the main article about the inventor of the light bulb, and slaps on another template.
- 4 persons to gradually delete content, until the section contains less information than the public phone book.
- 1 deletionist to remove the article completely because it is a stub (too short).
- The original user leaves Wikipedia - never to return again.
- 3 months from now:
- 1 different user to feel the absence of the Changing_a_Light_Bulb article, create it and start the cycle all over again.
Rouge Admins edit
Q: How many Rouge Admins does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: 50. 1 to screw in the lightbulb, 25 to discuss it on IRC, and the other 24 to write tongue-in-cheek essays about screwing in a lightbulb.
- A:. 26. 1 to screw in the lightbulb, 25 more to discuss it on IRC, and the first one to write 24 tongue-in-cheek essays about how and why he screwed in the lightbulb.
- A: Easy, 1. One to chat about it with his socks, one to screw it in, and 1 to have 24 of his socks write 24 similar tongue-in-cheek essays about screwing in a lightbulb.
Inclusionists edit
Q: How many inclusionists does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: 2. One to screw in the new bulb, another to carefully store the used bulb in case someone needs it in the future.
Deletionists edit
Q: How many deletionists does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: x+(x+1), where x is the number of deletionists who want to delete the lightbulb and (x+1) is the number of sysops it takes to continue to undelete the lightbulb. This can be an infinite process.
Correct answer edit
One. Any wikipedian can screw in a lightbulb. A more accurate question is "How long will the lightbulb stay screwed in?"
After multiple vandalisms and removals and readditions, an admin will be required to put a lock on the light bulb. That could pose a problem when the light bulb burns out. - Just a thought
RC Patrollers edit
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: Three. One anonymous user to change the lightbulb, one vandal to replace the lightbulb with 'lightbulbs r gay', and one RC patroller to revert to last good revision using popups.
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: Zero. Just tag the light bulb as {{unscrewed}} and let someone else worry about it!
Oversight edit
Q: How many oversighters does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: What lightbulb?
Sockpuppets edit
Q: How many sockpuppets does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: Five. One to change the lightbulb, and four to avert 3RR in order to preserve the change.
Q: How many bots does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: One, but he'll notify the lightbulb's owner that he changed it for him.
Bureaucrats edit
Q: How many bureaucrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: One, but only if the old lightbulb was never turned on.
Q: How many RFA voters does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: Ninety-nine. One to nominate the lightbulb, 96 to vote "Support per nom," and one to vote, "Oppose, I question the user's brightness." Oh, and one to change the lightbulb.
Q: How many RFA voters does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: 152. One to write "Oppose. I view self-noms as prima facie evidence of power hunger", 95 to complain about it, four to write "Support per Kurt", fifty to argue about whether there's a consensus, one to change the lightbulb, and one to block them all.
Q: How many RFB (request for bureaucratship) voters does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: Infinity. Infinity minus one to silence the opposition, and one to change the lightbulb.
Q: How many Wikipedians does it take to change a lightbulb, in accordance with fair use policy?
Esperanzians edit
Q: How many Esperanzians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A: 51. One to screw it in, and 50 to give the screwer barnstars, cookies, Wikihalos, ribbons, userboxes, thank you templates, and the like.
Cabals edit
Q) How many cabals does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) What cabals?
Q: How many AfD votes does it take to change a lightbulb?
- Transwiki to Wikibooks:Jokebook per precedent for lightbulb joke (university). This variation adds a new twist to the age-old joke and should be kept somewhere.
- Delete as non-notable with only 1 ghit, and Wikipedia is not a collection of indiscriminate jokes.
- Keep. It's funny.
- See WP:ILIKEIT.
- Delete. Waste of server space.
- See WP:PERF.
Q) How many arbitrators does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) Nine, barring absences, opposes, and recusals.
WikiProjects edit
Q) How many members of the Pokémon WikiProject does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) One, but only while he's busy trying to get the other 809 changed.
Q) How many members of The D&D WikiProject does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) Four, but only once they've felled the Tarrasque.
Q) How many members of The Wings Project does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) 747.
Q) How many members of the Wikification Wikiproject does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A) Only 1, but they have to add in links and formatting first.
Q) How many members of the Highways WikiProject does it take to crew in a lightbulb?
- A) Five, but only if they're stuck in a cloverleaf.
Wikignomes edit
Q How many Wikignomes does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A) They'd prefer not to, since doing so would attract unwanted attention to them. But, if worst came to worse, it would take about 63.
Vandalism edit
Q: How many vandals does it take to screw in a light "how many Wikipedians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
How many new users does it take to screw in a lightbulb? edit
Just one, but first he has to screw in a light bulb, get yelled at because it isn't bright enough, have it unscrewed, screw it in again, have it unscrewed and be told to read through a mountain of policies concerning lightbulb types, wattage, brightness, shape; and finally give up and make a myspace instead.
Gnomes edit
How many Gnomes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Editicountitis edit
How many Wikipedians with editcountitis does it take to change a lightbulb?
- 96. One to change it, and the rest to complain about how the changer hasn't changed enough lightbulbs to be taken seriously. J-stan Talk 02:42, 2 July 2007 (UTC)
How many Wikipedians under 18? edit
Seven. One to screw it in, and six trusted users to reveal that they are also under 18 to convince the community that the lightbulb has been screwed in fine. Malinaccier (talk) 00:41, 26 March 2008 (UTC)
How many Wikimedia project members does it take to screw in a light bulb? edit
One, if you're an admin with Single-user access. Nine for everyone else who has to have a separate account for every single project.
How many new users.... edit
Q: How many new users with pretty user pages that have colored backgrounds, multicolored signatures, in excess of 100 user boxes, their own personal barnstars that they exchange with anyone, a competition to see if you can find their "hidden page" and just one mainspace edit...does it take to screw in a lightbulb.
A: Actually, I have no idea - I just wanted to find somewhere to bitch about this kind of thing...er...sorry.
- It takes only one as long as they get a barnstar for it. Malinaccier (talk) 00:43, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
How many WikiPrincesses? edit
One - to hold it in place and have the universe revolve around her. ;) —La Pianista (T•C•S) 05:15, 23 December 2008 (UTC)
- Q. How many WikiGoons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
- A. Three. One to whack the lightbulb, one to clean up the blood, and one to screw in the bulb. Jonathan321 (talk) 00:49, 22 January 2009 (UTC)
- Q:How many WikiTARDISes does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A:None. Everyone knows police boxes can't change lightbulbs :P YOWUZA Talk 2 me!
Fundamental biology edit
- Q: How many amoebas does it take to change a lightbulb?
- A: One, no, two, no four, no eight, no 16, no 32.......
Wikipedians edit
- Q: How many Wikipedians can screw in a lightbulb?
- A: Don't be silly; real Wikipedians are much too big for such a futile venture, since a light bulb is too small.
A. 12. 1 newbie (a RL:electrician) to screw in the lightbulb. Two admins to pull out the chair he stands on to do it. 3 arbitrators to nod understandingly at the admin's claim they were "trying to help the newbie by pulling out the chair". 6 assorted to commiserate that it happened to them long ago and they know how it feels. Newbie leaves in search of publishing houses where he can install lightbulbs, and collects payment he didn't want. Penyulap talk 13:16, 12 August 2011 (UTC)