Talk:The Great American Bash (2007)

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BetacommandBot (talk) 20:44, 22 December 2007 (UTC)

Pre-GA review

Well, this article's great! It's thorough and gives great references. Just a few things and the article can go right to good article nominations:

• Tone: Most of the article is worded professionally, but there are a few things. In the six paragraph under "Event", the term "beat him up" is used. Try using a more sophisticated term, like "tackled him". Look through the rest of the article for similar terms, as they can be confusing to people who don't understand them. Otherwise, great job! Limetolime ^{talk to me • look what I did!} 22:18, 8 April 2008 (UTC)

Pre-GA review (2)

Lead

1. I assume there was no tagline?

   Correct. –LAX 23:17, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

2. It looks great!

   Thanks. ;) –LAX 23:17, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

Pictures

1. If the picture caption is not a complete sentence, it should not have a period.

   –LAX 22:47, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

Background

1. In the third paragraph, I think it should explain why the championship was vacant.

   –LAX 23:17, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

2. Wow, it's really well-written.

   Again, thanks. ;) –LAX 23:17, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

Event

1. MVP delivered Hardy a Playmaker and then pinned him to get the victory and to retain the United States Championship should be re-worded to MVP delivered a Playmaker to Hardy and pinned him to win the match and retain the United States Championship

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:56, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

2. When Montel Vontavious Porter is first mentioned, there should be (MVP) next to his name, to let a reader know that MVP is the same as Montel Vontavious Porter.

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:53, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

3. It should be explained that 'Ol Horny wasn't originally in the match. Also that he ran right out of the ring after the bell rang.

   –LAX 16:57, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

4. When it saids Hornswoggle came surprisingly, it should say "from under the ring, where he was hiding" or something like that.

   –LAX 16:57, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

5. Carlito delivered a Backstabber instead of Carlito gave him a Backcracker

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:36, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

6. Shouldn't Diva's be capitalized?

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:49, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

7. Melina dominated the early part of the match but afterwards Candice took control of the match. -- remove the second "of the match."

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:50, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

8. Explain why Melina started crying after the match.

   I've removed it. I don't see why it's notable. –LAX 17:01, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

9. Before Orton could hit Rhodes a running boot to the head, Dusty's son Cody made the save. insert "with" between "Rhodes a"

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:52, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

10. Change Originally to "In the beginning" in this sentence Originally, Batista and Kane double-teamed Khali after trying to put him down.

    --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:52, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

11. It was just 2 is wrong. It should say Batista only made a two count

    --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 01:02, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

12. delivered Kane a Khali Bomb. should be delivered a Khali Bomb to Kane

    --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:44, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

13. After a series of beating from whom to whom?

    I think I got it. --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 01:01, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

Aftermath

1. ....on the next edition. The next edition of what?

   Rewrote the section. –LAX 16:57, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

2. Randy Orton delivered Cena an RKO should be Randy Orton delivered an RKO to Cena

   --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 00:38, 15 April 2008 (UTC)

Results

1. The match notes need to be sourced.

That's it. The article is in good shape. Let me know when you're done. iMatthew 2008 22:40, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:The Great American Bash (2007)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

1. Is it reasonably well written?

   A. Prose quality:

• 'Lead
  • The main match on the Raw brand was John Cena versus Bobby Lashley for the WWE Championship, which Cena won by pinfall after executing an FU from the second rope.[3]--executing an FU on who/what?
  • The predominant match on the SmackDown! brand was The Great Khali versus Batista versus Kane in a Triple Threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship, which Khali won by pinning Kane after Batista delivered a Batista Bomb to Kane, followed by a Giant Chokeslam.[4] -- Ok, this needs to be reworded, as I am lost at what is occurring here. Can it just simply say, Khali delivered a Giant Chokeslam?
  • The primary match on the ECW brand was John Morrison versus CM Punk for the ECW Championship, which Morrison won by pinning Punk.[5] -- The other matches outlined in the lead had the "how" it ended, why doesn't this match outline "how" it was won?
• Background
  • The feud began on the June 11, 2007 edition of Raw when Lashley was drafted to the Raw brand and stripped of his ECW Championship.[8] -- a comma is needed in this sentence, makes it a run-on.
  • Three weeks later, on the July 2 edition of Raw, a "Beat the Clock" tournament was held to determine John Cena's opponent for the WWE Championship at The Great American Bash. --, I think a link to some type of explanation of the Beat the Clock tournament would help here, if not, an explanation in the article.
  • Later that night, Edge legitimately injured his left pectoral muscle after Kane, who was disguised as a king, attacked him during his Mardi Gras celebration. -- I think saying Kane dressed up as one of the attractions, or characters would fit better here than saying King.
  • On the July 20 edition of SmackDown!, Edge was forced to vacate the World Heavyweight Championship. -- Why was he forced?
• Event
  • The second match was a Cruiserweight Open match for the WWE Cruiserweight Championship. Chavo Guerrero defended the title against Funaki, Jimmy Wang Yang, Shannon Moore and Jamie Noble. Hornswoggle, who wasn't booked to be in the match, became a part of the match when he entered ring as bell rang. -- Ummm, entered ring? "the" should be inserted there.
  • All the cruiserweights were down except Noble. Hornswoggle, who was under the ring for the match, came surprisingly and delivered a Tadpole Splash on Noble.--in replacement of the word "down", can't "eliminated" be used instead? Also, instead of using "came", why not "entered"?
  • The third match was a Singapore Cane on a Pole match between Carlito and Sandman. The rules of the match were that the one who retrieved the cane from the pole was allowed to use the cane. Sandman retrieved the cane, but before he could use it, Carlito executed a Backstabber and pinned him to win the match.[26] The fourth match was a Divas match between Candice Michelle and Melina for the WWE Women's Championship. After a back and forth match, Candice executed a Candy Wrapper on Melina, and pinned her afetr to retain the title.[27]--consider using another word instead of "executing" in one of their places, its to repetitive.
  • Punk was on the verge of winning the match until Morrison left the ring. He took the belt and pretended to leave the match but Punk chased him and tackled him. Punk pushed Morrison to the ring. -- these two sentence should flow more, there should be some type of transition here to make them flow.
  • Khali pinned Kane following to win the match and retain the title.[4]--following what?
• Aftermath
  • MVP and Hardy had an arm wrestling contest on August 3 edition of SmackDown!.[29] --if this is relevant to the feud, it should say who won.
  • On August 18 edition of Saturday Night's Main Event, Evander Holyfield replaced MVP against Matt Hardy in a boxing match.[30][21]--same as above.
  • At SummerSlam, Stone Cold Steve Austin replaced Matt Hardy in a Beer Drinking Contest against MVP which was no contest because Austin delivered a Stone Cold Stunner to MVP.[32] -- which was ___ no contest.
  • On July 31 edition of ECW, CM Punk defeated Elijah Burke and Tommy Dreamer in a Triple Threat match to earn a 15 Minutes of Fame match with Morrison the next week.[33]-- On __ July 31..
  • On July 27 edition of SmackDown!, Khali had his Championship Celebration which was crashed by Batista. Batista challenged Khali to a match for the World Heavyweight Championship match.[36]--these dont have a transition which link them, did Batista challenge him during the celebration? or later that night? etc.?
  • On July 23 edition of Raw, John Cena teamed with Candice Michelle in a 3-on-2 handicap match against Umaga, Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch. -- On ___ July 23..?
  • After the match, Randy Orton delivered an RKO to Cena. He was then made the number one contender to the WWE Championship. - who was made number one contender?

1. B. MoS compliance:

2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?

   A. References to sources:

   B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:

   C. No original research:

3. Is it broad in its coverage?

   A. Major aspects:

   B. Focused:

4. Is it neutral?

   Fair representation without bias:

• Event
  • Punk was on the verge of winning the match until Morrison left the ring. He took the belt and pretended to leave the match but Punk chased him and tackled him. -- Im not sure, but pretended sound like a POV.
  • While Khali was laid out, Batista and Kane fought inside the ring, with Batista executing a Batista Bomb. -- again, not sure, but another word could replace "laid out".
• Aftermath
  • On July 27 edition of SmackDown!, Khali had his Championship Celebration which was crashed by Batista.--not certain about this either, but mayby "interrupted" could replace "crashed".

1. Is it stable?

   No edit wars, etc:

2. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?

   A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:

   B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:

3. Overall:

   Pass or Fail:

   The article looks great, though a few issues with the prose as outlined above. If those are addressed, the article may pass. Good luck ;)--SRX^--LatinoHeat 20:33, 20 June 2008 (UTC)

I believe I have addressed all of the tasks. -- iMatthew _T.C. 21:46, 20 June 2008 (UTC)

Much much better. Passed--SRX^--LatinoHeat 23:04, 20 June 2008 (UTC)

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