The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that when Roy Conacher(pictured) was elected to the Hockey Hall of Fame in 1998, he joined his brothers Lionel and Charlie as the only trio of siblings so honoured?
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Been a while since I reviewed a hockey guy, so I'll give this a shot. Wizardman 17:40, 4 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
Here are the issues I found:
"Conacher played his minor hockey with the Toronto Marlboro organization with whom he was a member of Ontario provincial championship winning teams at the bantam and midget age groups." This feels a bit like a run-on to me. Not sure how to reword it, it just sounds off when said aloud.
Fixed?
"for the following two seasons where led the Halifax city league" missing a word
Fixed. Also broke up another run-on sentence.
The couple uses of colons don't seem appropriate; double-check those.
Removed a couple. Fixed?
Just a couple minor fixes, I'll put on hold and pass when fixed. Wizardman 03:39, 7 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done, hopefully! Appreciate the review! Resolute 04:01, 8 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
Everything checks out here, so I'll pass the article. Wizardman 04:36, 11 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
Latest comment: 10 years ago2 comments2 people in discussion
Are you sure Conacher is the first rookie to lead the NHL in goal scoring? Nels Stewart seems like the first guy to do it in 1925-26 with the Montreal Maroons. Heroman26 (talk) 19:27, 4 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
You're right. I checked back and realized I misinterpreted the source. Thanks for that! Resolute 19:41, 4 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
