Talk:Christian Ramsay/GA1

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Delldot in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Delldot (talk · contribs) 04:16, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply

I will take this one. delldot ∇. 04:16, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply

From a search I did it seems as comprehensive as it can be given the availability of sources. Most of the references are of high quality, and everything cites a source. Just a few quick comments on the prose:

  • Could this be rephrased to get rid of the awkward noun + -ing construction? "...which led to her being made an honorary member of the society..." and "...due to the family suffering severe financial losses..."
  • This sentence is awkward: "Her and her husband's collection was purchased in 1985 with parts going to the Nova Scotia Museum..." There's the noun + -ing thing, 'Her and her husband's collection' is awkward, and 'with' is not great as a conjunction. Maybe "The collection that she and her husband had made was purchased in 1985; parts went to the Nova Scotia Museum..."
  • Awkward sentence: "He also named Asplenium dalhousiae, a species of Himalayan fern that she discovered, after her."
  • Are there any extant pictures of her watercolors? That would be great to include if possible.

I have no major complaints, everything looks pretty good! delldot ∇. 04:44, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply

All images check out. delldot ∇. 07:01, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply
Thanks for the review delldot, I am sure the prose could do with improvement, I never claimed to be an excellent writer! I'll have a think about how to rephrase the suggested sentences. As to the water colour, the only one I have managed to find is an example of a caricature - it's in this source, but as there's no backstory - it makes the picture a bit redundant. WormTT(talk) 10:06, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply
I've refactored a few sentences, including the ones you've suggested - hopefully the remaining noun + -ing constructions aren't too awkward. Could you have another look please, delldot? WormTT(talk) 11:02, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply
Looks good, all my complaints have been addressed, and I can't think of any new ones. I think this meets all the GA criteria given what information seems to exist on her. Good job!   delldot ∇. 20:39, 7 January 2016 (UTC)Reply