Wikipedia:Peer review/The Bellflower Bunnies (season 3)/archive1

The Bellflower Bunnies (season 3) edit

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A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for October 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed.
Now that I'm done with the season lists, I might be finally off to editing the main book and show pages for the Passiflore franchise, as part of my plans for a featured topic on it.

If you are checking over this, please see also:

Thanks, Slgrandson (How's my egg-throwing coleslaw?) 04:09, 15 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: I think this is the third time I have reviewed this material (since it used to be part of the larger list). I hope I can still keep critical distance to review it well, and I do think it is much better. I have also reviewed the Season 2 list and some the comments may be very similar. Anyway, here are some suggestions for improvement.

There are still some places that need a bit polish on the language - I think getting someone to copyedit before FLC would be very useful. Just a few examples: The title card for Season 3 as it appears in English (also used for Season 2). Characters from left to right: Poppy, Violette and Periwinkle. why not just say something like The title card for Seasons 2 and 3 as it appears in English. ...? Or At the beck and call of a jealous badger, Poppy must build a machine to lift out a sacred treasure from a lake. I am not sure about this, maybe something like Poppy must build a machine for a jealous badger to lift a sacred treasure from a lake.??
Some places seem to needs refs Returnees included director Eric Berthier, producer Particia Robert, writer Valérie Baranski, executive co-producer Paul Cadieux, and executive producers Yves Pont and Franck Algard. or This season runs approximately 580 minutes in length. Except for "Les Passiflore à la mer" (based on an original Beechwood Bunny Tale), the episodes are based on original scripts by Valérie Baranski. No English titles have been supplied for them.
Is there any way to make the table internal divisions all the same size / width? The lines between the title and the air date vary considerably on my computer and would look much nicer if they were always in the same place (formatting)
This season runs approximately 500 minutes in length. probably needs a ref. It is more usual to indicate the length of a typical episode (I think), as well as the total length.
In the note Numbers to the right refer to their positions in this season. could an example be added, see Season 2 review for a suggestion.
Could the two two-sentence paragraphs in Episodes be combined to make one paragraph?

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 02:18, 24 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]