Wikipedia:Peer review/Stan Coveleski/archive1

Stan Coveleski edit

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to see this become an FA, but I feel like there's a bit missing, not sure what. Article isn't too long though I've exhausted all the sources I have on my end. It's now a GA, so hopefully it's at least close to FAC ready.

Thanks, Wizardman Operation Big Bear 16:18, 16 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Comments – Taking a break from my reviewing/closing/nominating tasks elsewhere to do a peer review of this Hall of Famer's article. Overall, I don't think it looks too bad, but a copy-edit would be helpful.

  • The team first names probably don't need repeating in the lead, but this is minor and I wouldn't raise a stink if they remained.
  • I don't see the last two sentences of the lead represented anywhere in the body, and what's in the lead should be representative of the article as a whole. It looks like the content would fit well in the Early years section; maybe it could be added there.
  • Early years: I assume by "ball-playing brothers", you mean baseball-playing? That seems obvious to us, but I think it could be made clearer for non-baseball fans. Also, the bit about Frank and John also playing is redundant to this sentence.
  • Philadelphia Athletics and minor leagues: Redundancy in "called him up to the major leagues, and he made his major league debut for...".
  • Cleveland Indians: "On September 19, Coveleski pitched a one-hitter against the New York Yankees, which was broken up by Fritz Maisel in the seventh inning." A no-hitter was what was broken up, not the one-hitter. That could be made more clear, for the non-baseball fans out there.
  • More redundant wording: "He won his first seven starting appearances to start off the season".
  • And "In the game, Coveleski hit a sacrifice fly to help the Indians win the game". The game ... the game.
  • Grammar issue in "Coveleski's efforts led the Indians to the winning the AL pennant...".
  • "While he did knock the Yankees from first place in late August after winning an August 23 game against them". Don't think the "late August" is necessary to put in, as August 23 is late August by definition.
  • Washington Senators and New York Yankees: "of" is missing from "and two the Senators' four losses."
  • What is meant to be supporting the last sentence of this section? Giants2008 (Talk) 02:33, 20 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
    Thanks for the review; will address the comments shortly. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 19:20, 23 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
    Issues fixed except for the last one. The stats clearly show that he didn't play another game after that, though there's not a source that says he retired verbatim; the lack of another game merely implies it. Not really sure how to source that. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 17:56, 24 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]