Wikipedia:Peer review/Passions/archive1

Passions edit

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I've listed this article for peer review because…

Article regarding fictional daytime drama/soap opera. Looking for ways to improve it.

Thanks, Dougie WII (talk) 00:08, 12 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments:

This article has many paragraphs and even whole sections which are completely unreferenced - if it is going to become a WP:GA (or WP:FA) it will need inline citations throughout. See WP:CITE and WP:RS and WP:V.
Since it is about a soap opera, please see WP:IN-U about writing from an out of universe perspective.
Most articles on works of fiction I have read list the plot synopsis first and the characters second. Since the Series history section gives many of the major plot developments, perhaps the plot section (Storylines) could be moved directly after it?

I just deleted that section because it didn't provide a comprehensive plot summary and plot summaries are better represented in the individual character articles. -- Dougie WII (talk) 19:22, 23 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

It is generally useful to find a model article (or two) that is GA or FA and use that as a pattern to improve the article.

EastEnders appears to be a good article to look at for those working on Passions. Since it's a British soap, I bet most American Passions viewers, like me, know nothing about it, so it helps put things into the perspective of someone who knows nothing about the show before reading the article. -- Dougie WII (talk) 04:38, 22 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I do not understand the Comings and goings table in the charaters section.

That refers to new characters/actors scheduled to join the cast or older ones leaving the show.

It is also not clear if the table on Noted guest stars could not be better presented as text.
Avoid repeptition - for example, the novel Hidden Passions gets its own section and then the information is repeated in the Product placement section, or the move to DirecTV is mentioned many times.
Generally decently written - I was able to follow most of the plot.
No information on critical reception.

Working on that: Passions#Critical reception

The References given need more information - internet refs need title, publisher, author (if known) and date accessed.
Any other images that can be added? Pictures of some of the cast members perhaps?
The early emphasis on paranormal plots is mentioned - could one or two specific examples be given (in context)? It already mentions opening a closet door to hell, but who did this and what was their reaction? Just curious.

Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 11:17, 20 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you so much for all the tips! -- Dougie WII (talk) 15:04, 20 March 2008 (UTC)[reply]