Wikipedia:Peer review/New England/archive1

New England edit

I would appreciate a peer review of this article. Specifically:

  1. Where are references most needed?
  2. Where is the fluff, and can it be cut? This applies especially to the politics, education, and culture sections (where us New Englanders can be a bit too proud, I'm afraid).
  3. What statements need references? Of course all claims should be cited. But which ones stick out as being especially in need of citation?
  4. How's the grammar and writing style?
  5. Should we keep the infobox, or get rid of it?
  6. How's the length?
  7. Most important: What is currently preventing this article from achieving featured status, in your opinion?

Any help with the following would be great:

  • Copyediting
  • Reference hunting
  • Fluff trimming
  • Fat cutting

Thanks, all! --AaronS 18:20, 13 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

  • The section Notable New Englanders has no entries, but only a link to the main article. How would you feel about adding a few really significant people, like U.S. presidents? I know how hard it can be to keep the list down to a small number, but having a criterion can help. Fg2 02:15, 14 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
  • The sports section is strong. Would mentioning minor-league teams strengthen it further? As it stands, it's top-heavy with Massachusetts teams. Also, Boston has a reputation for sports writing. Present and former reporters for the papers, and perhaps announcers, especially any who became famous nationwide, would be a possible direction for expanding the section. 07:10, 14 July 2006 (UTC)
  • There are also individual sports such as boxing, golf, tennis. Rocky Marciano and Marvin Hagler come to mind, and lists in articles on states would probably turn up more. Again, limiting the discussion to people who have won nationwide titles can help prevent it from growing out of hand. This is important because there are lots of individuals in sports (though few minor-league teams). 07:26, 14 July 2006 (UTC)
  • The Education section begins with a long list of colleges and universities. The following Culture and education section repeats much of the earlier section. Then Academic publishing contains just one paragraph. I suggest consolidating all three heads and rewriting to eliminate repetition.
  • Later, Urban New England contains two lists, which are not both necessary. The first is for Greater Boston, and belongs in the article Greater Boston. The second is the one to keep for New England.

Fg2 08:01, 17 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

  • The two paragraphs on the Patriots' proposed move to Connecticut can probably be replaced by a single-sentence summary. There's similar material in the article on the Patriots.
  • In the Economy section you mention dairy production. This might be an opportunity to name Ben & Jerry's, a brand with widespread recognition. Also to name the crops that farmers produce, including tobacco (Connecticut ranks 7th, which might surprise many readers). Potatoes, Christmas trees. There are also local traditions such as maple sugar production. Cranberries.
Blueberries 07:44, 19 July 2006 (UTC)

Related to shellfish digging is the quahog, which might deserve mention (or it might not). Likewise "The Perfect Storm." And WHOI. This USDA page on Massachusetts and similar ones for the other states (just type the two-letter abbreviation in place of "MA") could be valuable references.

Fg2 10:33, 18 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

  • In publishing, there's Merriam-Webster in Springfield. Yankee Magazine in New Hampshire. The defunct Byte Magazine, formerly in NH, had worldwide circulation and was translated into foreign-language editions. Fg2 07:44, 19 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Update edit

Thanks a lot for your helpful comments. I've tried to adhere to as many as possible. Take a look at the changes in the article. What do you think, now? Do you think it might be ready for FA status? --AaronS 12:48, 20 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]