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Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Spice and Wolf episodes/archive1

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List of Spice and Wolf episodes

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
And another Peer Review request from me... I recently happened upon this page and it definitely looks ready for a FLC, though I'd like to run it through here first. The main spot for my concern, as with many other Anime episode lists, would be the episode summaries themselves. Thanks, NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 03:38, 20 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Copyedited. Microchip08 22:13, 24 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Dabomb87 (talk · contribs) General comments before FLC. The article needs another copy-edit, I stiil find prose issues easily:

  • Just a note that you have to be the primary contrubutor to nominate the article for FLC; alternatively, you have to have the primary contributor's permission.
  • I'll ask before nominating, if I nominate at all. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "twenty-five-year-old" Very clumsy, why not "25-year-old"?
  • Just a note to watch for needed commas: Here, to set off non-essential clauses: "Kraft Lawrence, a twenty-five-year-old traveling peddler" Comma after "peddler".
  • Fixed just that one, I'll go look for more in a bit. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Lawrence agrees to bring her along on his travels. "-->Lawrence allows her to accompany him on his travels.
  • "There, they meet a younger traveling merchant named Zeelen" Comma after here.
  • "who tells Lawrence of a plan regarding" Read through the entire article for instances of this noun + -ing sentence structure. "plan regarding"-->plan that regards
  • Fixed one, will look for more later. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "While traveling, Lawrence recounts how he was attacked by wolves eight times before in the forest, but Holo defends wolves too much and Lawrence snaps back at her." Awkward phrasing.
  • Changed it a bit... I made it a bit colloquial, so see if it still needs improvement.
  • It's pretty good. I have always that thought that it was "strikes a nerve" though. Dabomb87 (talk) 19:34, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Why is episode 07 a different color (and out of chronological order)?
  • It's an OVA. If you look at [1], the series skips right over episode 7. As the refs in the lead show, the episode us numbered as seven. I can remove the color if you'd like, but I feel it brings out the fact that it is out of place and that it is an OVA. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add a footnote that explains the color differences. Dabomb87 (talk) 19:34, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Unfortunately, Lawrence only" I think "However" is better here.
  • "Though the clothes merchant" I think it is clothing merchant.
  • "female shepherd and stop to greet her, though Holo is less than enthusiastic. " Why?
  • "He is forced with an ultimatum:" Not a precise wording; maybe "He is faced with an ultimatum:"
  • "Lawrence manages to scrounge up a few coins" "manages to" is wordy. Why not simply, "Lawrence scrounges up a few coins"?
  • "Lawrence manages to burn the ropes holding him off" Same comment as above, and what do you mean by "holding him off"?
  • I don't see it failing WP:RS in any way as it just is a database for storing airdates and times for Japanese Television series... Additionally, it has been used in other Featured Lists. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:10, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • The "it's used in other FLs/FAs" argument doesn't fly, those were promoted in 2007 and I doubt that the sources were checked like they are now. To determine the reliablity of the site, we need to know what sort of fact checking they do. You can establish this by showing news articles that say the site is reliable/noteworthy/etc. or you can show a page on the site that gives their rules for submissions/etc. or you can show they are backed by a media company/university/institute, or you can show that the website gives its sources and methods, or there are some other ways that would work too. It's their reputation for reliabilty that needs to be demonstrated. Please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia Signpost/2008-06-26/Dispatches for further detailed information. Dabomb87 (talk) 19:39, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Since I doubt I can prove WP:RS with that, I've added an official source. Anyways, according to a Google machine translation, I read it as entered by data management people (and therefore professionals and not the public). In any event, sources should be set now. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 20:31, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Actually, I just realized something. List of Bleach episodes, which is at FLC, and which you supported while saying "Sources look good." uses the exact same site as its first reference. Is this site a reliable source or not? NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 21:04, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Wow, thanks for noticing that. I went back and found a couple issues that I hadn't noticed before. Also, could you provide the reference numbers from the Bleach list? Dabomb87 (talk) 21:08, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • It's just the first bulleted reference under General. I'd still argue that the site is a reliable source however, so I don't think it is an issue. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 21:11, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Wow, that is a ton of information... Done. NOCTURNENOIR ( t • c ) 19:56, 25 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
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