Lemon Tree (film) edit
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review since I want to take it to GA review and I'm looking to see if there's any issues.
Thanks, The Squicks (talk) 20:50, 17 September 2009 (UTC)
Majoreditor comments I've taken just a quick glance at the article, but my initial impression is that it is close to meeting GA standards. Some thoughts:
- The lead looks like it include a small amount of material which doesn't appear in the body of the article.
- Consider adding additional material on the film's commercial reception.
- At first glance the article appears to be well-cited, broad, and reasonably well-written.
Should I have more time I will try to provide a more in-depth review. Cheers, Majoreditor (talk) 17:19, 26 September 2009 (UTC)
Finetooth comments: This is an informative article about what sounds like an interesting movie. I have a few suggestions for improvement.
- It would be helpful to mention in the infobox at least what language(s) are spoken in the film. What is the primary language?
- It might be worthwhile to mention that Riklis is an Israeli filmmaker and that Abbass and Suliman are Palestinians. WP:FILMCAST suggests adding a "Cast" section that includes information about the cast and crew, including the director. If you created a "Cast" section, you could add to it the list of actors that appears in the lead but not in the main text (something noted by Majoreditor above). To this could be added details about the director's other experience, films, and so on, and similar details about the actors. This would help meet the GA requirement for broad coverage of the topic.
- Although you list a total for gross revenue in the infobox, no more details appear in the main text. I was hoping as I read the "Reception" section to find something about box-office receipts or ticket sales. (I agree with Majoreditor).
- Has the film been released on DVD?
- Can anything be said about the soundtrack?
- Unless there's a special reason for a list, straight prose is generally favored over bulleted lists. I think the "Awards and nominations" section would work fine as straight prose, and I would not double-bold the names of the festivals there or in the lead.
- "The struggle of Salma, together with the lawyer Ziad Daud (Ali Suliman), gets to the Supreme Court, involving not only the international press but also Mira Navon (Rona Lipaz-Michael), the minister's wife." - Is Daud her lawyer? If so, you might change this to say, "The struggle of Salma and her lawyer, Ziad Daud (Ali Suliman), reaches the Supreme Court of Israel and involves not only the international press but also Mira Navon (Rona Lipaz-Michael), the minister's wife."
- "Critic Hugh Hart of San Francisco Chronicle thought that the movie displays a natural sympathy to its protagonist." - If you use past tense for "thought", you should probably use "displayed" to avoid switching verb tense in mid-sentence. Or "thinks" and "displays".
- It's a good idea to add alt text to the images so that readers who can't see the images will know what they reveal. WP:ALT has details about how to write alt text and where to put it. You can also view recent examples of alt text at WP:FAC.
- The dabfinder tool that lives here finds a wikilink that goes to a disambiguation page instead of to the intended target.
- Can you find any reviews of the movie that appeared in Israeli newspapers or magazines? Any comments by Palestinian critics or other Palestinians?
I hope these few suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article of your choice. Finetooth (talk) 21:03, 30 September 2009 (UTC)
- Those are excellent points. Thank you very much both of you for reading the article and commenting. The Squicks (talk) 04:55, 1 October 2009 (UTC)