Wikipedia:Peer review/Five Nights at Freddy's (video game)/archive1
Five Nights at Freddy's (video game) edit
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I’m hoping to nominate this article for FA and would like a peer review for tips on how to improve the article and bring it up to a FA standard.
Thanks, GenericWikiUser1 (talk) 08:26, 24 January 2021 (UTC)
AviationFreak edit
- Two "and"s in the 1st sentence of the 3rd lede paragraph is clunky
- Some things talked about in "Gameplay" could be considered WP:CRUFT, especially things like easter eggs and difficulty levels
- @AviationFreak: I feel its appropriate to mention Golden Freddy because he is another way for the game to end other than being jumpscared by the main four animatronics (which is discussed in the previous sentence). And are difficulty levels really considered fancruft? It seems reasonable to mention how there are five main levels, then a sixth night and customisable night when talking about gameplay.
- I've never played the game myself and I'm not really familiar with it, so to me this felt a little too "niche" to be included in the article. I think the applicable guideline here is WP:INDISCRIMINATE, so it really comes down to whether or not this info should be included in a "summary." Again, I'm not familiar with the game so I don't know how major these things are within the game. AviationFreak💬 03:27, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
- @AviationFreak: I feel its appropriate to mention Golden Freddy because he is another way for the game to end other than being jumpscared by the main four animatronics (which is discussed in the previous sentence). And are difficulty levels really considered fancruft? It seems reasonable to mention how there are five main levels, then a sixth night and customisable night when talking about gameplay.
- We see the phrase "working as a night security guard..." or something similar in the beginning of the first three sections
- The list of characters is unwieldy and IMO should only be in "Gameplay" or "Plot"
- suffered dramatically in its history could be suffered dramatically throughout its history or similar
- The sentence in "Plot" about paychecks after the 5th and 6th nights could be condensed into Mike receives a paycheck after both the fifth and sixth nights
- Make sure all phrases inside quotations follow WP:LQUOTE
- Was 3ds Max really used to render the graphics? Rendering is usually done by the game engine (see Game engine#Rendering engine)
- "App store" wikilink should be piped to the Apple App Store
- Quotes in "reception" need to use in-text attribution per WP:ATTRIBUTEPOV.
- Hopefully the daily revenue figure in "Sales" is an average, in which case that should be noted.
- An overall "net earnings" or similar figure should be included in "Sales" if possible
- More images would be useful if possible, though they need not be of gameplay.
Overall the article looks pretty good IMO. A copyedit could be useful, but I think the issues are small and few enough that it's not a huge deal. I have not checked the refs. AviationFreak💬 18:29, 25 January 2021 (UTC)