Wikipedia:Peer review/Deadalive/archive2

Deadalive edit

Previous peer review

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to see it promoted to FA one of these days. I've been working on it for about a year now, and it's a GA, as well as an A-class article. I just underwent its first copyedit. Any assistance would be excellent. Thank you, Gen. Quon (Talk) 18:23, 17 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • Would you consider the "series' overarching alien mythology" as a story arc? I've seen it referred to as such.
  • "viewed by 12.4 million viewers" bit repetitive with the "view..." thing.
  • " After the body of alien abductee Billy Miles's (Zachary Ansley) body" too many bodies?
  • "threatens Skinner with nanobots" not sure what that means really. If someone threatened me with nanobots, I'd just squish them and carry on...
  • You wait to the third para to link "alien" and "abduction".
  • You link vital signs in the main body but not in the lead, why?
  • "In the previous episode" you mean "In the final episode of the previous series" or something similar.
  • Image captions which aren't complete sentences shouldn't have a period.
  • "burying the man[…]just " spaces...
  • Not sure there's a genuine need for a picture of strawberry jam.
  • Is it Miles's or Miles'?
  • What is "a Swiss facial mask"?

The Rambling Man (talk) 19:51, 30 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much for your comments. How does the article look now?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 21:06, 30 January 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • "Meanwhile, rogue FBI agent Alex Krycek (Nicholas Lea) uses Skinner nanobot blood infection as leverages tries to get him to kill Scully's unborn child." -- I think there is a missing/incorrect word here (I'm not sure what it's trying to say)
  • "...causing the veins in Skinner's neck bulge, making him stumble." -- I think you mean "causing the veins in Skinner's neck to bulge, making him stumble."?
  • Scully gets a new lab report, which says that Miles has (literally) became a new person. -- I don't understand this -- new DNA?
  • Spotnitz later called the directing "fantastic" - a little clarity; -> Spotnitz later called the directing of "Deadalive" "fantastic"
  • "an 11-percent share" dash isn't needed Ruby 2010/2013 22:13, 1 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks a ton! I believe I have got them all.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 01:03, 2 February 2013 (UTC)[reply]