Wikipedia:Peer review/Crash Bandicoot (video game)/archive1

Crash Bandicoot (video game)

I'm listing this article for peer review because I'm hoping to get it up to Featured Article status in time for the series' 25th anniversary this September. I've already spent a good chunk of the month doing prep work, but as far as FAs go, I'm sure there's definitely a few improvements I'm still missing out on. For example, the page is still relatively bare in the image area, so I'd especially like suggestions on what points are most worth visually illustrating. I do intend on getting an image put together showing Crash's early designs, so that'd be a start.

This would be my very first FAC, so any and all input would be appreciated. Thanks, Cat's Tuxedo (talk) 22:52, 24 April 2021 (UTC)

Comments from Aven13

It's a very good article. You probably wouldn't have too much trouble getting it through FA. Here are some suggestions:

• As you said, the article is lacking in the image department. I personally would recommend adding a video of crash's movement, and perhaps completing a short section of level one or two. Seeing a game being played really helps to give the reader a feel for it. I'd also recommend getting a visual of a Crate, a Wumpa Fruit, or some TNT to put in the gameplay section.
• For the character and art design section, yes, some concept art would be good, but showing the frames of one of Crash's animations would also work.
• Mention the perspective of the gameplay somewhere.
• Since Tawna is "also evolved by Cortex,", make a mention of how Crash was made as well.

More to come, probably. Great job writing the article. Aven13 14:49, 4 May 2021 (UTC)

@Aven13: Just had to figure out this gif thing, but went and addressed your points so far! Cat's Tuxedo (talk) 23:08, 4 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments from Gerald Waldo Luis

As Aven pointed out, the article looks in great shape, and I see a smooth FAC process. Although, here are some comments to make it easier.

• (LEAD) "showcase forward-scrolling and side-scrolling perspectives." Perhaps link side-scrolling game in "side-scrolling perspectives"?
• (LEAD) "video games during a cross-country trip from Boston to Los Angeles." The "from Boston to Los Angeles" bit is probably too specific for a lead, which is practically a summary. At least IMHO.
• (LEAD) "The titular character was eventually named "Crash Bandicoot" for his"-- perhaps shorten to "Crash Bandicoot was named for his".
• (LEAD) "and the game was unveiled at the 1996 Electronic Entertainment Expo." --> "and the game was unveiled at E3 1996."
• (LEAD) Link video game remaster in "remastered version".

• (GAMEPLAY) "from a traditional side-scrolling perspective." Link side-scrolling game.
• (GAMEPLAY) The first paragraph repeats the word "Crash" loads of times. If you wanna ask me for suggestion --- let's suppose sentence 1 has the word "Crash." Leave sentence 2 and 3 with "him" instead of "Crash", then have "Crash" at sentence 4. So in this case, sentence 2, 3, and 6 would have "him."
• (GAMEPLAY) "Tawna's bonus rounds are the easiest and most plentiful"-- I think easy is subjective. Perhaps "designed to be the easiest" or "widely considered the easiest" etc.
• (GAMEPLAY) "will grant Crash a gem"-- I don't think a link to gem is needed; it's common word.

• (PLOT) "In a secluded archipelago 300 miles"-- should there be Template:Convert for those that use metric? GeraldWL 17:19, 1 July 2021 (UTC)

@Gerald Waldo Luis: Taken care of. Cat's Tuxedo (talk) 06:08, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Comments from SRich32977

In the Bibliography section – "Meston, Zach (1996). Crash Bandicoot: The Official Strategy Guide. Dimension Publishing. ASIN B000OBI980" – where does this data come from? The ASIN does not mention Meston or 1996. (WorldCat does have listings for Meston, but which of them is the ref that is posted in the article?) – S. Rich (talk) 03:38, 13 August 2021 (UTC)

@Srich32977: I got the info from page 6 in the guide, but I scrounged around and got the OCLC for it. Cat's Tuxedo (talk) 06:15, 13 August 2021 (UTC)