Wikipedia:Peer review/1995 Atlantic hurricane season/archive1

1995 Atlantic hurricane season

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because with the 1995 Atlantic hurricane season being one of the most active Atlantic hurricane seasons on record, and it marking a huge change in the number of tropical cyclones we have seen since, I want to eventually get it up to Good/Featured Article status. Before I change a lot on the article, I want to know what needs to be fixed. Comments?

Thanks, -- TropicalAnalystwx13 (Talk) 17:10, 10 December 2011 (UTC)

Comments

• Just me perhaps, but using the word "hurricane" four times in the intro sentence is somewhat bland.
• " tying with 2010, 2011, and 1887." any reason these aren't in chronological order?
• "produced strong waves that drowned eight" wind doesn't typically drown people.
• Note one is next to "major hurricane" but describes an average season. Note two is next to "major hurricane" and defines (on its second instance) what a major hurricane is...
  • For Note 1, it was talking about the whole sentence in general instead of just the major hurricane part. It'd be a little weird to have two notes side by side, right? So, I just put the major hurricane note next to the next instance "major hurricane" is used. – TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 12:37, 15 December 2011 (UTC)
• The final note about Allison could be merged into the sentence where you already talk about Allison in the first para (besides, you've over linked Allison in any case).
• "began on June 1, and activity in 1995 began on the next day with the formation of Hurricane Allison on June 2." don't think you need "the next day" and "on June 2" here.
• "19 of the depressions " I would merge this with the previous sentence like ", 19 of which...."
• "1950-2005 average of two per season. " en-dash here, and ref?
• "but that storm never " don't think you need "that storm".
• "which almost thirty days" grammar fail.
• Not sure the storm chart meets WP:ACCESS since it uses only colour to convey the SS category of each storm.
• No category for 118 km/h?
• Allison - Cuba overlinked.
• Allison - "rated as F1" - what does that mean?
• Dean - "$720 thousand" odd, why not just $720,000 like all the others?
• Erin - "Erin managed to briefly intensify " just "Erin briefly intensified" would read better to me.
• Erin - "over 1 million people" - over one million.
• Erin - "The pecan crop in Baldwin County lost 50 to 75 percent of its total portion" - "Between 50 to 75 percent of the pecan crop in Baldwin County was lost".
• Felix - "A tropical wave existed " odd way of saying it.
• Felix (and others) - sometimes you convert damages to 2011 US$ and sometimes not. Any reason for the discrepancies?
• Gabrielle - "Though according to t" I wouldn't start a sentence with "Though" if I could avoid it, you could simply merge this and the previous sentence and put a comma before "though".
• Iris - "Iris would approach land" - just "Iris approached land" is neater.
• Jerry - a common issue I suspect, "33 miles (53 km)" and "40 mph (55 km/h)" - 7 miles equates to 2 km? I don't think so...!
• Jerry - "there eight fatalities" grammar fail.
• Karen - "Karen within 65 miles." no conversion here?
• Luis - RMS Queen Elizabeth 2 - ship names are usually italicised.
• Opal - "the first to receive an 'O' name since Atlantic hurricane naming began in 1950." ref?
• Opal - "Yucatan" previously you had a diacritic on this.
• Retirement section is unreferenced.
• Season effects table could be sortable.
• Luis entry - Newfoundland is a dab link.
• Why are country/state names bold?
• Season Aggregates -> Season aggregates.
• Don't mix date formats in the references.
• Refs 27, 28, 53, 54 are incompletely formatted.
• Ref 56 for instance, year range should use an en-dash, not a hyphen.
• Ref 31, NO NEED TO SHOUT.
• Ref 3 v Ref 5 - be consistent with author names, first last, or last, first.
• Further reading, some really odd formatting going on there...
• Tool showing ref 22 is dead.

The Rambling Man (talk) 11:20, 15 December 2011 (UTC)