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Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes/archive2

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by Giants2008 via FACBot (talk) 00:25, 11 May 2020 (UTC) [1].[reply]

List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes edit

List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Nominator(s): I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 20:12, 23 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

In Summer 2018, Deidaramonroe nominated List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes for FLC status. It failed. However, I, self-named I'm Aya Syameimaru!, was influenced by Deidaramonroe's actions to take this back here. I responded to TompaDompa's comments in the 2018 review and fulfilled it well. Now I nominated this FLC status, so this should succeed. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 20:12, 23 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from ChrisTheDude (talk) 12:05, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
;Comments
  • "It follows the story of Japanese 14-year-old middle school student" - "It follows the story of 14-year-old Japanese middle school student" reads better, I think
Done. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:08, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Source for the whole of that first paragraph?
Done, I completed it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 11:06, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Since then, more commercials have been shown in the same slot revealing the characters and cast" => "Subsequently, more commercials were shown in the same slot revealing the characters and cast"
I fulfilled it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:10, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the broadcast of episodes 11 and 12 were delayed" => "the broadcasts of episodes 11 and 12 were delayed"
Got it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:10, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 4 - "Out in the city Madoka notices several people, including her classmate Hitomi Shizuki, infected by the witch's kiss" - "Out in the city Madoka notices several people infected by the witch's kiss, including her classmate Hitomi Shizuki, " reads better I think
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Same ep - Elsewhere, Kyubey greets a recently arrived" => "Elsewhere, Kyubey greets a recently-arrived"
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 6 - "insists that she gives up on Sayaka" => "insists that she give up on Sayaka"
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Same ep - "Homura whom she blames for Mami's death" - add a comma after Homura
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 8 - "is an appropriate term to "witch"" - I would say "equivalent term"
Finished the suggestion. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:33, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 11 - "Homura's constant trips through time to try and save Madoka has" => "Homura's constant trips through time to try and save Madoka have"
Finished the suggestion. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:33, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs 8 and 20-25 have no work/publisher listed and I don't think "archived copy" is actually the title of the source
Just simply done. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:56, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I finished it all quickly. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 11:07, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I'm very pleased with how well this is going so far. «“I'm Aya Syameimaru!”I„文々。新聞“I„userbako”» 01:00, 3 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from TompaDompa (talk) 23:25, 29 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Comments:
  • The table should not be sortable.
  • In the first table, all the air dates have a reference except the first one.
  • help each of them decide if there was a wish they would risk their lives for – this phrasing is a bit awkward.
  • while Madoka finds Mami – "goes to find" is better than "finds" in this context (assuming I've understood the events correctly).
  • As they continue Madoka mentions her wish is to simply be a magical girl and help others. – two things: Firstly, I'd add a comma after "continue". Secondly, I'd either add "that" after "mentions" or replace "is" with a colon, and I think the former would be better.
  • Mami laments that her job as a magical girl has left her lonely and afraid but feels happy that Madoka wishes to fight alongside her. – the sentence switches from the negative to the positive aspects very abruptly. I'd either add something along the lines of "on the other hand" or "also" after "but", or simply add a comma before "but".
  • notices several people [...] prepare to kill themselves – "prepare" should be "preparing".
  • infected by the witch's kiss – this the same witch as in the previous episode (Charlotte)? If it is, then that should be made explicit. If not, the definite article should be replaced with the indefinite one.
  • Later that day Madoka joins Sayaka on patrol, where they find a witch's familiar, but it escapes when Sayaka's attacks are blocked by Kyōko, who only cares about collecting Grief Seeds from mature witches. – This sentence has three commas. Either rephrase it to reduce the number of commas or split the sentence into multiple shorter ones.
  • Kyubey mentions to Sayaka about the potential Madoka has to become a magical girl – either change "mentions" to "talks", or remove "about" and move "to Sayaka" to the end.
  • mentioning that something known as Walpurgisnacht is approaching in two weeks to which Kyōko agrees to form an alliance with her to fight against it – I'd replace "to which" with a semicolon.
  • Sayaka gets angry at Kyubey for keeping the truth from her – this should be clarified.
  • he keeps her in check by making her feel the pain she would have felt otherwise while fighting Kyōko – this should be rephrased for clarity.
  • Madoka asks Homura about the meaning behind Kyubey's actions and why she never told them – this should be clarified.
  • Elsewhere, Kyubey muses that as a "woman" who has yet to mature is called a "girl", it follows that "magical girl" (魔法少女) is an equalivalent term to "witch" (魔女). – putting aside the typo, I don't think equivalence is the right way to describe this. Perhaps "magical girl" (魔法少女) is the corresponding term for a "witch" (魔女) who has yet to mature. would be better.
  • Incubators are coldly logical, with emotion considered an illness, so Madoka can understand the process. – huh?
  • The episode looks at an alternate timeline – I'd say "This episode [...]".
  • In the second table, "No." should be No. (i.e. {{abbr|No.|Number}}).
  • I'd add a short paragraph above the home video release tables.
  • The references in the home video release tables are poorly placed. Either make a new column solely for the references (and name it Ref(s) – i.e. {{abbr|Ref(s)|Reference(s)}}) or try WP:BUNDLING the citations and add them in the table captions.
  • The home video release tables have some abbreviations that should either be spelled out or use the {{abbr}} template.

TompaDompa (talk) 12:44, 25 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I made a few copyedits myself, and all my comments have now been resolved. TompaDompa (talk) 23:25, 29 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

It's cool being with you. We both get nice jobs. «I'm Aya Syameimaru!I文々。新聞Iuserbako» 01:33, 30 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I think 3 support is a minimum requirement for this FLC to pass, I would keep this alive and wait for another person to support it anyways. «ias!I,,.Iuserbako⬜» 03:24, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Source review

Since this is listed as needing a source review I am going to perform that over the next day or so, part of my promise at My FLC nomination. Note, while I am part of the WikiCup I am not looking to claim points for the source review I'm going to do. MPJ-DK (talk) 21:38, 7 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Quick feedback:

  • madoka-magic.com
    • It's the official website for Puella Magi Madoka Magica, so it's a reliable source. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Anime Newtype Channel
    • It's an official website for the magazine Newtype, so it's a reliable source. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 06:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I see three different date formats in the sources - October 30, 2010 / 2011-07-26 / 27 August 2016 - pick the one that is appropriate for articles on Japanese subjects and make it consistent.
    • I picked "October 30, 2010" and used it for the whole article. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 06:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Anime News Network is not always linked in the citations
  • There is a "." after Anime Newtype Channel. - unless that's part of the official name it should be removed
    • Well, I changed "Anime Newtype Channel." to "Anime Newtype Channel (anime.webnt.jp)", so now this comment is resolved. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 06:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • All sources should have the date it was published listed as well as the author whenever known
    1. 9 does not have any accessdate or much else filled in.
  • All sources with Japanese titles should have "trans-title" defined
    1. 20 does not have "script-title=ja:" set, instead it just uses "title=" for the Japanese title.
First paragraph
  • It is really through inference that it's this Anime that they are talking about as there is no title, no identifiable info that makes it clear they're talking about this series, not a different one.
    • Added a ref that says such a thing. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:54, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Sources 1 and 2 does not support most of what is stated in this sentence It follows the story of 14-year-old Japanese middle school student Madoka Kaname, who is offered the chance to have any wish granted on the condition that she become a magical girl and fight against evil witches. except her name I guess.
    • Added a ref that says such a thing, same solution as the last and next comment. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:54, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Atsuhiro Iwakami - is not mentioned in the sources
    • I archived the sources so that he's mentioned. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:54, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Second paragraph
  • The main source is printed, so WP:AGF on content for this one
Third paragraph
  • I cannot find this information in the source The first ten episodes aired on Japanese television channels MBS, TBS and CBC between January 7, 2011 and March 11, 2011??
  • Episodes were then made available for streaming on Nico Nico Douga and BIGLOBE's Anime One service one week after broadcast. - Not sourced?
  • Sources [7][5][8] are in the wrong order, should be 5-7-8
  • June 12, 2012 is not listed in the source, only the other date.
  • Article says "October 29" but the source lists the date as "October 22"
Fourth paragraph
  • both were released on February 16, 2011 on DVD and Blu-ray not supported by the source
  • On the DVD/Blu-ray release, the ending theme for episodes one and two is "See you Tomorrow" (また あした, Mata Ashita) by Aoi Yūki, and the ending theme for episode nine is "And I'm Home" by Eri Kitamura and Ai Nonaka. Drama CDs are included with the first, third and fifth DVD/Blu-ray volumes and the original soundtrack by Kajiura Yuki was included in three parts with the second, fourth and sixth volumes. The soundtrack is also included with the limited-edition North American releases. is not covered by the source, that just states the date is "unconfirmed".
Fifth paragraph
  • an original story set after the series was released in October 2013 - not supported by the source, it simply states "an all-new story".
    • Resolved, changed "original" to a quote saying "all-new". «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:58, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Table
  • I know the plot does not need a source, but all the other information does, right?
Drama CDs
  • source [18] does not state there are 4 CDs.
  • There are no sources to even confirm the existence of the first three CDs
Home Video release
  • No issues

That is the end of my source review for now, if changes and improvements are made I'll be happy to review, revisit and revise my comments. MPJ-DK (talk) 23:45, 7 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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