Template talk:Did you know/Herman Hollis

Latest comment: 12 years ago by Sueswim03

Herman Hollis edit

Archived nomination
The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Crisco 1492 (talk)

 

Created by Sueswim03 (talk). Self nom at 23:12, 4 August 2011 (UTC)Reply

  • Length, age, sources, neutrality OK. Hook is a little confused (we don't really know to whom "fatal" refers). Picture is fine. Checking copyvio etc. Yomanganitalk 00:01, 5 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • Thanks, Yomangani-- good point re: "fatal." I am OK with removing that word from the hook. Sueswim03 (talk) 00:19, 5 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
  The sections on the Dillinger and Nelson shootouts and the aftermath are identical or almost identical to the sources: [1] [2]. FBI publications may be public domain as part of the US Government, but if that is the case the article is not original to Wikipedia and is therefore ineligible. If it is rewritten in time there is no reason why it shouldn't go through.Yomanganitalk 00:25, 5 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
Can re-write, add additional sources for those sections. Sueswim03 (talk) 01:34, 5 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
Done; those sections should be much better now. Sueswim03 (talk) 06:33, 5 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
They are, but the Nelson section still follows the structure of the source quite closely (you can perhaps expand on how Nelson got round behind the agents and where his wife suddenly popped up from for starters) and the aftermath section reuses both the structure and quite a lot of the source phrasing - I realise that is difficult to change when using technical vocabulary, but I suspect you can get a bit further away. Good work so far though. Yomanganitalk 01:28, 6 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
-- Sections updated, should be a bit further away now; thanks for your advice, Yomangani. Sueswim03 (talk) 18:17, 8 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
  Everything OK now. Yomanganitalk 22:12, 8 August 2011 (UTC)Reply
I'm ok with removing picture from the hook if that is backlogging the promotion process. Sueswim03 (talk) 03:44, 11 August 2011 (UTC)Reply