Talk:Ugetsu/GA1

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Ssven2 in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Ssven2 (talk · contribs) 09:01, 15 January 2017 (UTC)Reply


I will review this article. Thank you.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:01, 15 January 2017 (UTC)Reply

Lead
  • "masterpiece" sounds and reads better than "masterwork" IMHO.
    •   Done Both are acceptable but I'm fine with this. Ribbet32 (talk) 01:13, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply
  • "It is credited with simultaneously helping to popularize Japanese cinema in the West and influencing later Japanese film." — "It is credited with simultaneously helping to popularise Japanese cinema in the West and influencing later Japanese films."
    • "Film" is properly used to describe cinema collectively. [1] Ribbet32 (talk) 01:13, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply
Plot
  • It is above the 400-700 barrier (779 words to be exact). Try and trim it down. Otherwise, this section is good.
    • Film (and this plot) is public domain. I have trimmed down unnecessary details, and left what I think is important. Ribbet32 (talk) 01:13, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply
Production
  • "Director Kenji Mizoguchi made the affects of war a major theme of his film." — affects or effects?
  • "Mizoguchi was offered to make a film at Daiei Film studios by his old friend Masaichi Nagata." — Can be rephrased as "Mizoguchi was offered to make a film by his old friend Masaichi Nagata at Daiei Film studios."
  • "This story provided a basis for Tōbei's subplot." — Is this mentioned in ref no. 2 (Wakeman 1987), ref no. 4 (Criterion) or in Russell 2011? If so, cite it.
    • The next sentence makes this clear IMO. If anything, this is overcited as stands. Ribbet32 (talk) 01:13, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply
  • "while Mizoguchi was willingly absent" — Do you mean to say he gave them room to make their (actors) own improvisations on the scenes? If so, mentioning it would be good.
    •   Done Nothing about improvisations, but clarified. Ribbet32 (talk) 01:13, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply
  • "Southern School in Chinese painting" — Shouldn't it be of instead of in?
  • Wikilink "geza music". Maybe this ought to help.
Themes and Release
  • Made a slight ce to the former. Nothing wrong in the latter.
Reception
  • BTW, a mention of Anderson's opinion on Ugetsu would be good (If it is stated in Wakeman's book). Otherwise, leave it as it is.
  • "Ugetsu opens with a long panorama around a lake, a shot which begins on the far shore and then tilts down to reveal the village at the conclusion. It closes with the child and the father offering a bowl of rice at the mother's grave ... with the camera moving off into an upward tilting panorama which describes the movement of the opening." — Borders on WP:QUOTEFARM here. Consider explaining part of the sentence a bit rather than quoting it.
Legacy
  • Nothing wrong here. This section is good.
References
@Ribbet32: Good job on improving the article, Ribbet32. Address these comments and the article is promoted to GA.  — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 09:35, 16 January 2017 (UTC)Reply

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

  1. Is it reasonably well written?
    A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:  
    B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:  
  2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
    A. Has an appropriate reference section:  
    B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:  
    C. No original research:  
  3. Is it broad in its coverage?
    A. Major aspects:  
    B. Focused:  
  4. Is it neutral?
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. Is it stable?
    No edit wars, etc:  
  6. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
    A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:  
    B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:  
  7. Overall: Passed, my queries were met and solved by the nominator.
    Pass or Fail:  

@Ribbet32: Congratulations! Mizoguchi's masterpiece has passed.    — Ssven2 Looking at you, kid 06:52, 17 January 2017 (UTC)Reply