Talk:Sleeping Dogs (video game)/GA2

Latest comment: 9 years ago by SNUGGUMS in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: SNUGGUMS (talk · contribs) 03:20, 22 August 2014 (UTC)Reply


Comments shall come within seven days.

Great! Can't wait for it! URDNEXT (talk) 18:21, 22 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Lead
  • For simplicity sake, remove "player" from "The player character's criminal activities"
  • "Although there isn't a multiplayer component"..... avoid contractions unless part of a quote or title
  • "The game was finally released worldwide in late 2012"..... August isn't that late in the calender year, so just say "in 2012"
  • "and in-depth, convincing depiction of Hong Kong"..... POV, just say their depiction of Hong Kong
  • "subpar graphics, clunky camera, and stiff animations"..... more POV, just say graphics, camera, and animations
Gameplay
  • "Once the player finishes the opening missions, he can freely explore the game world"..... to avoid potentially sounding sexist, let's say something like "After finishing the opening missions, players can freely explore the game world"
  • I dislike using the plural "players", but reworded similarly. Tezero (talk) 03:49, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Singular "player", which I see you used, is just as good Snuggums (talk / edits) 03:52, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "yellowish" isn't very encyclopedic
  • Elaborate on "potential girlfriends" the protagonist can have; include what players can do on dates, the process of getting dates, things like that
Done. URDNEXT (talk) 17:17, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Development
  • "a couple of months after"..... a more encyclopedic way to say this would be *insert number* months after
Done URDNEXT (talk)
  • "swappped" → "swapped" (typo)
Done URDNEXT (talk)
  • Remove "After a couple of months" from "After a couple of months, in August"
Done URDNEXT (talk)
  • "Sleeping Dogs was released worldwide in late 2012 and was both a critical and commercial success, selling over 1.5 million copies worldwide within one year of its release" needs a citation
  • I think it's more that this is one of the only situations for which lead citations are allowed, but done. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • You misunderstood- I meant to give a citation in the "development" section, not the lead (WP:LEADCITE) Snuggums (talk / edits) 14:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done SNUGGUMS URDNEXT (talk) 16:18, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Design
  • "went down to Hong Kong"..... traveled
  • "you can always detect quality acting through a person’s performance" → "you can always detect quality acting through a person's performance" per MOS:QUOTEMARKS
Audio
  • "We didn't want to go with just plain music, we wanted to add DJs to the radio stations; but we also had to be very clear with our choices because we didn't want to get to the point where there was a level of parody with the radio stations" shouldn't be a separate paragraph, and try paraphrasing this a bit
Done URDNEXT (talk)
Downloadable content
  • Remove the commas from "February, 2013" as well as "October, 2012" and "December, 2012"
  • Put a comma after Year of the Snake in "The third and final story-based expansion, Year of the Snake was released"
  • Technically this one could be correct a la "A well-respected actor, John Wayne was...", but done anyway. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Reception
Critical reception
  • Remove "the British" from "Ben Wilson from the British PlayStation Official Magazine"
  • Did this for disambiguation, but done. Tezero (talk) 03:49, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "Allistair Pinsof from Destructoid, and staff of Edge magazine found" → "Allistair Pinsof from Destructoid, and Edge found"
  • Remove "the British" from "Jon Blyth of the British Official Xbox Magazine"
References
  • FN20: unreliable
Put a PlayStation Blog post instead URDNEXT (talk) 16:28, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN26: YouTube is not acceptable, sorry
  • It's from the game's official channel. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Even so, this can sometimes lead to potential copyright issues Snuggums (talk / edits) 14:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Why would it in this case? We already cite plenty of stuff from the official website, manual, and in-game text; what makes an official video different? I can see copyright being an issue with citing, say, a Let's Play. Tezero (talk) 20:28, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • There have been many instances were copyrights were infringed for including YouTube links, so we should at it safe and not use the site as a ref at all since its use is very discouraged unless being used as an EL Snuggums (talk / edits) 21:19, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done URDNEXT (talk) 21:47, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN33: reliable?
I put a GameSpot article in its place! URDNEXT (talk) 16:34, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN36: remove the "computerandvideogames.com" bit
  • Could've sworn I'd nailed all of those. Done. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN49: Dead, and Facebook is discouraged as a source to begin with- replace/remove it
  • FN50: Twitter is discouraged as a source
Disagree as its supporting the statement about the publisher using social media to promote the game. URDNEXT (talk) 16:51, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
I get what you're saying, but it is still very discouraged to use as a ref, especially when reliable secondary sources can be used in place Snuggums (talk / edits) 21:19, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Solved. URDNEXT (talk) 21:46, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN53: reliable?
Done URDNEXT (talk) 16:51, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN57: "GameSpot.com" should read GameSpot
  • FN58: "SleepingDogs.net" should read "Sleeping Dogs"
  • Standardized to "United Front Games" per other citations. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN65: Same as FN20
They're not the same. URDNEXT (talk) 16:56, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
URDNEXT, I think he means it's unreliable. Tezero (talk) 20:31, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done URDNEXT (talk) 21:48, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN78: reliable?
Eurogamer is one of the biggest gaming sites in the world. URDNEXT (talk) 16:56, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN87: "Edge-online.com" should read Edge, and "Edge Magazine" shouldn't be part of the title
  • FN97: Same as FN26
They're not the same. URDNEXT (talk) 16:57, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • FN103: Remove "Guardian News and Media"

Something needs to be done with the "cite error" messages. Also, apply either "month-day-year" format or "day-month-year" format for all references. Magazines like "Official PlayStation Magazine" and "Official Xbox Magazine" should be italicized.

  • Those messages come from the recent removal of information relating to the demo, which of course had citations. I've done a good number of the date fixes but more remain, of course. Tezero (talk) 04:02, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • I've noticed, just be sure to address them before September 4th Snuggums (talk / edits) 14:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
So, we're done right? Tezero URDNEXT (talk) 20:32, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
URDNEXT, Snuggums'll tell us when he thinks it's done. Tezero (talk) 20:37, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Tezero, by the way, I searched the depths of the internet and couldn't find a beter source than 65. Unless you count GameFaqs as one. URDNEXT (talk) 20:46, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Unfortunately, URDNEXT, that may mean it has to go. We'll see what he says. Tezero (talk) 20:50, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Alright, let's kick it out of the ship. Tezero SNUGGUMS URDNEXT (talk) 20:58, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done everything left, SNUGGUMS! URDNEXT (talk) 21:49, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Metro and YouTube still need to be replaced, and "Eurogamer.net" should read Eurogamer. As for the citation errors, I'll see what I can do unless Tezero knows how to fix them. Snuggums (talk / edits) 22:04, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Those come from using list-defined refs that aren't used in the body text; the text appended to them must've been removed. Tezero (talk) 22:06, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Done the YouTube refs, but I can't do the Eurogamer ones. On to Metro. URDNEXT (talk) 22:12, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Finished the Metro thing, and replaced it with a OC Gamer article. SNUGGUMS Tezero What are we gonna do with the missing refs then? URDNEXT (talk) 22:19, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Just so that we could speed this up, I've handled all the Eurogamer/Eurogamer.com problems. Now that we have pretty much handled all the issues, the only problems in our way are the missing refs, which I'm gonna leave it to you guys as I have no idea on how to handle them. SNUGGUMS Tezero URDNEXT (talk) 22:53, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
Did all the missing ref work, apparently it was easier than I thought. The article is finally ready for passing I believe. SNUGGUMS Tezero URDNEXT (talk) 23:19, 28 August 2014 (UTC)Reply
GA Result
  • On hold for seven days