Talk:SMS Condor/GA1
Latest comment: 10 years ago by Sturmvogel 66 in topic GA Review
GA Review edit
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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 08:59, 4 December 2013 (UTC)
I will get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 08:59, 4 December 2013 (UTC)
- Specify that Geier was a sister ship.
- Done.
- Link sister ship, if you'd be so kind.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:11, 10 December 2013 (UTC)
- Most certainly.
- Link sister ship, if you'd be so kind.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:11, 10 December 2013 (UTC)
- Done.
- Condor was 83.9 meters (275 ft) long overall and had a beam of 12.7 m (42 ft) and a draft of 4.42 m (14.5 ft) forward. Replace the first "and" with a comma.
- I don't think that's right - if you cut down the sentence to the basic structure, you get "Condor was 'A'...and had 'B' and 'C'." If you replace the "and" with a comma, you get "Condor was 'A', had 'B' and 'C'.", which isn't right.
- This is the phrasing that I generally use: Kreml was 221 feet (67.4 m) long overall, with a beam of 53 feet (16.2 m) and a mean draft of 15 feet (4.6 m). It avoids the doubled "and" and reads acceptably, I think.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:09, 10 December 2013 (UTC)
- Yeah, that sounds fine to me too.
- This is the phrasing that I generally use: Kreml was 221 feet (67.4 m) long overall, with a beam of 53 feet (16.2 m) and a mean draft of 15 feet (4.6 m). It avoids the doubled "and" and reads acceptably, I think.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:09, 10 December 2013 (UTC)
- I don't think that's right - if you cut down the sentence to the basic structure, you get "Condor was 'A'...and had 'B' and 'C'." If you replace the "and" with a comma, you get "Condor was 'A', had 'B' and 'C'.", which isn't right.
- Refine the link to steam engine to the proper type of Marine steam engine.
- Done.
- Add a link to boiler, QF gun, revolver cannon.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:13, 10 December 2013 (UTC)