Talk:Pokémon Crystal

Latest comment: 20 days ago by Hilst in topic Did you know nomination

GA Review edit

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


This review is transcluded from Talk:Pokémon Crystal/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: A412 (talk · contribs) 18:24, 6 March 2024 (UTC)Reply


I'll do this one. ~ A412 talk! 18:24, 6 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

  • This looks really good! The questions I have about sourcing are the only really critical questions; the writing is very close to GA, barring some confusing sentences and MOS:WORDSTOWATCH stuff, and my prose review is a lot of MOS nitpicking. Feel free to push back on anything you don't think makes the article better, and ping me for another look. ~ A412 talk! 02:23, 7 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
    Really appreciate your in-depth advice, this is a very good review and I welcome any further comments. I think I've covered most things other than where comments are raised below. VRXCES (talk) 01:55, 8 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
      • There are a couple things where it sounds like you changed them but the article doesn't reflect that. Did one of your changes get lost somewhere? ~ A412 talk! 20:24, 8 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
        I'll take a look, might have ignored an edit conflict or something of the like. Thanks for letting me know. VRXCES (talk) 02:32, 10 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
        Ok, addressed where you flagged below. Not sure what happened there it only seems to have been a few minor edits that weren't made. No rush and if there's anything else you would like to flag, let me know. VRXCES (talk) 04:54, 10 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

References edit

As of this revision.

Spotcheck edit

  • [1] - Checks out.
  • [6] - Checks out.
  • [11] - Checks out.
  • [16] - Nitpicky, but the source says the announcement was for "North America", whereas the article says "Western markets".  Y Changed to North America.
  • [21] - I'm probably just unfamiliar with EGM, but I don't see where 7.0 / 7.5 / 3.5 comes from. I see numbers in several categories at the bottom, but they don't seem to match up.  ? They're in the watermark behind the text of the review of each contributor. This approach is preferable to the metrics below which don't summarise the overall game per se. Some pages average out the three scores for EGM too.
  • [26] - Checks out.
  • [31] - The source appears to list monthly sales for November, and last weekly sales for December. It doesn't appear to list monthly sales for December.  Y Correct, I've changed this to be more generally a weekly sales chart reflective of the source.
    • We appear to be still saying this.
  • [36] - Checks out for values, but I think "significant drop" is editorializing without a source saying so (this one does not).  Y Absolutely fair. I faintly remember a source remarking on the reduced success but it is generally not a point that needs to be made when the numbers speak for themselves.
    • We appear to be still saying this.
  • [41] - Checks out.
  • [46] - Checks out.
  • [51] - Checks out.

RS edit

  • [41] (Gaming Bible) is listed by WP:VG/S as unreliable.  Y Removed
  • What is [46] (Well Played), and is it reliable? I can't find discussion of this source anywhere.  ? Sort of like Press Start Australia, this is an Australian media outlet thus the lack of coverage that may have situational value. At best it has a review and ethics policy making it sort of like Digitally Downloaded. Won't press it if it does seem patently unreliable.
  • [52] Per WP:SCHOLARSHIP, "Masters dissertations and theses are considered reliable only if they can be shown to have had significant scholarly influence".  Y Agree. Replaced with a marginally more reliable if unusual source that substantiates the same point.
    • We appear to be still citing this source.

CV edit

  • Checks out except for quotes. Can we quote [46] a bit less (if we don't think it's unreliable to begin with)?  Y Yes, at any rate I think this source can be edited down; I like it just as it raises an interesting point.

OR edit

  • Checks out.

Images edit

  • Infobox: Image is fine. I don't think sourcing to Bulbapedia is correct; they're not the publisher of that image. { ? Very fair point given Bulbapedia isn't a wildly good source. It might be tricky to find a version of the cover published by the creator or scanning the cover as a derivative work, but I'll have a think.
  • Gameplay: Checks out.

Lead edit

  • First paragraph
    • 'second generation' - Double quotes are standard per MOS:DOUBLE, but I also think you could remove the quotes entirely.  Y
    • Consider linking video game accessory for peripheral  Y
  • Second paragraph
    • and its role in maintaining interest in Pokémon during a waning period in the Pokémania phenomenon - With neither a bluelink nor any context in the lead, "Pokémania phenomenon" comes off as jargon. Can we try something more understandable without context?  Y I agree this can come out of the headline.
    • Later generations of Pokémon games have followed the pattern of a later enhanced title introduced by Crystal, including Pokémon Emerald and Pokémon Platinum. - awkward: double "later", subject is "generations" in first clause but two games in the second, "introduced by Crystal" is placed weirdly. Suggestion: Later generations of Pokémon games followed Crystal's model of releasing an enhanced version following the primary games, such as Generation III's Pokémon Emerald and Generation IV's Pokémon Platinum.  Y

Gameplay edit

  • First paragraph
    • Optional comment: While I get that we shouldn't duplicate the hatted gameplay section, could we at least summarize it in the first sentence? Suggestion is something along the lines of Like Pokémon Gold and Silver, Pokémon Crystal is a role-playing video game where players navigate a fictional world by capturing, training, and battling with Pokémon. (I'm not in any love with my wording, feel free to make it better.)  Y
    • minor cosmetic or gameplay improvements - minor comes off as editorializing unless the source describes the features as "minor".  Y
    • Consider linking sprite (computer graphics).  Y
    • A major cosmetic change includes - Are there other elements to the "major cosmetic change"? If not, I think involves or is are more accurate, and same comment about editorializing.  Y
    • 'Battle Tower' - Same comment about MOS:DOUBLE.  Y
    • in Olivine City - Neither this article nor the GS article mentions Olivine City, I'd remove it as unnecessary/confusing.  Y
  • Second paragraph
    • Consider linking cellular phones, wireless networking.  Y
    • The Mobile System GB enabled players to use a cell service to receive a number of networked features, including to - Bit wordy. Suggestion The Mobile System GB enabled players to use networked features to  Y

Plot edit

  • Depending on how you feel about linking to sections/section redirects, consider linking List of Pokémon characters#Gym leaders and Elite Four, Suicune, Entei, and Raikou.  Y
  • Crystal features a greater role for the legendary Pokémon Suicune, with the player awakening the legendary Pokémon Suicune, Entei, and Raikou, - double "legendary Pokémon", would be nice to reword to remove one of the two instances. Suggestion: Crystal features a greater role for the legendary Pokémon Suicune, Entei, and Raikou,  Y
  • The plotline features a new character, Eusine, who has been searching for Suicune, is also introduced, - features a new character is redundant to is also introduced. Suggestion: The game introduces a new character, Eusine, who has been searching for Suicune,  Y

Development and release edit

  • First paragraph
    • Delink second instance in section of Gold and Silver MOS:DL  Y
    • Nintendo initially announced development of Crystal and the Mobile System GB in December 1999, developed under the working title of Pokémon X - Was Crystal or Mobile System GB titled Pokémon X?  Y Clarified.
    • Delink second instance in section of Junichi Masuda MOS:DL, and we can shorten to Masuda  Y
  • Second paragraph
    • General comment: I feel this paragraph is written in a very Western-centric way, but I don't have a suggestion (or the sourcing) on how to fix this.  ? Agree, I suppose the article could merit a WP:NONENG approach but I agree it's a tricky one absent Japanese sourcing.
    • Delink second instance in section of Nintendo MOS:DL  Y
    • Spaceworld appears to be called Space World in its article.  Y
    • IGN noted that - I would specify what country/region IGN is writing from.  Y
  • Third paragraph
    • Following release -> Following its release  Y
    • Consider linking Nintendo eShop  Y

Reception edit

  • First paragraph
    • "a great deal of value," -> "a great deal of value", MOS:LQUOTE  Y
    • highlighting the quality of life features that "enhance and broaden the game's overall variety", including timed events, quality of life improvements and visual embellishments - Doubled "quality of life"  Y
    • Kelly Starr of Nintendo Gamer found the new features to form "enough little differences to make (the game) a worthwhile addition," directing praise at the ability to play as a female trainer, the inclusion of location signs, and the enhanced animations. - MOS:LQUOTE again, MOS:PMC for editing quotes, and a bit of awkward wording, so suggestion: Kelly Starr of Nintendo Gamer found the new features to form "enough little differences to make [the game] a worthwhile addition", praising the ability to play as a female trainer, the inclusion of location signs, and the enhanced animations.  Y I just edited it down; the full quote isn't really worth fully paraphrasing in line with the below advice.
  • Second paragraph
    • General: this paragraph is more than half quotes. Can we paraphrase some of these?  Y
    • Many critics noted the additions to Crystal were insubstantial and difficult to distinguish from Gold and Silver - MOS:SAID discourages noted, and in this case it serves to frame "...were insubstantial" as a statement of fact, not opinion.  Y
  • Third paragraph
    • Delink second instance in section of Pokémon Gold and Silver MOS:DL  Y
    • 'enhanced' - this comes off MOS:SCAREQUOTE-y, probably don't need to quote.  Y

Legacy edit

  • Second paragraph
    • features that would become a standard -> features that would become standard  Y
    • 'chosen one', 'Battle Tower' MOS:DOUBLE  Y
  • Third paragraph
    • boldly made in this context - Ironically, I can't figure out what the context of "this context" is.  Y Just removed that wording, it's confusing anyway.
  • Fourth paragraph
    • Writing for Polygon, Juno Stump stated Pokémon Crystal and Kris impacted (girls) greatly, allowing us to finally see ourselves in a video game and on our very own Pokémon adventure." - I think there's a quotation mark missing somewhere, and same thing about MOS:PMC and brackets.  Y
    • Clare McBride of SyFy Wire wrote that "(whilst) playing as Kris didn't change the mechanics or storyline of the game at all...it changed the game for us. Instead of having to (play) a clearly male character...we got explicitly invited into the Pokémon space we’d already been inhabiting. WP:PMC  Y
    • Although the intent of the feature was to "appeal to cisgender girls", queer and transgender authors have also noted the formative queer experience of being able to play as a character whose gender does not reflect the one assigned at birth - Consider linking cisgender, queer, and transgender.  Y
Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )
3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked   are unassessed
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Did you know nomination edit

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Hilst talk 10:29, 7 April 2024 (UTC)Reply

 
The Mobile System GB connected to a Game Boy Color and cell phone

Improved to Good Article status by Vrxces (talk). Self-nominated at 03:12, 11 March 2024 (UTC). Post-promotion hook changes for this nom will be logged at Template talk:Did you know nominations/Pokémon Crystal; consider watching this nomination, if it is successful, until the hook appears on the Main Page.Reply

  •   Article is neutral, free from copyvio, suitably referenced, and meets the required length—promoted to GA on 10 March, the day before this nomination. The hook is succinct, neutral, interesting, and reliably sourced—AGF on the foreign-language translation. I would recommend a slight trimming to add more impact:
    • ALT0b: ... that the Japanese version of Pokémon Crystal allowed players to trade and battle over mobile networks using an adapter packaged with the game?
User is exempt from QPQ. Not too sure on the image—I trust that the uploader received the correct permissions, but would feel much more confident if it was approved through VRT at Commons (@Vrxces: I recommend you consider this to avoid any complications). In any case, I'll leave it to the promoter. Besides that, this is good to go! Rhain (he/him) 23:02, 11 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Hi @Rhain:, apologies if I didn't do this correctly. The image owner completed the form at the VRT release generator and attached the file to an email granting the license. Were there any other steps I should have completed to ensure that this release is verifiable for other users? VRXCES (talk) 00:20, 12 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
    @Vrxces: No need to apologise! Did the image owner send the email to the VRT (permissions-commons@wikimedia.org)? Rhain (he/him) 00:59, 12 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
    Hi @Rhain:, looks like they sent it to photosubmission@wikimedia.org. VRXCES (talk) 01:04, 12 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
    @Vrxces: Great! In that case, it might be worth adding {{Permission pending}} to the file page so the VRT can verify the email and license. Rhain (he/him) 01:16, 12 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
      Image permission has been approved by VRT, so reinstating this tick with the image included. Rhain (he/him) 05:02, 13 March 2024 (UTC)Reply