Talk:Operation Transom/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 13:58, 9 August 2020 (UTC)

I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:58, 9 August 2020 (UTC)

Thank you Nick-D (talk) 22:47, 9 August 2020 (UTC)

• No DABs, images appropriately licensed
• involved American and British aircraft launched from two aircraft carriers This is a bit confusing since no British-built aircraft participated in the attack. Clarify that the attack was conducted by American and British aircraft carriers.
  • Done Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
    • Umm, from two American and a British aircraft carriers
      • Typo fixed - when reviewing I just fix typos like this rather than point them out, as it involves less wear and tear on my keyboard! It also leaves me with a useful mark in the article's history to use to see if/how the changes I suggested were made. Nick-D (talk) 22:51, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• Link Indian Ocean
  • Done Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• The fleet conducted an air raid against the Japanese-held island of Sabang in the Dutch East Indies on 19 April as part of Operation Cockpit. This attack involved aircraft flying from both Illustrious and Saratoga, and was successful. Awkward, possibly combine them.
  • Good point - done Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• would form a diversion Suggest "act as"
  • Done Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• two British and one French battleship Reorder to use the plural and the same here Seven American and one British submarines
• Somerville met with the commander of the United States Seventh Fleet Admiral Thomas C. Kinkaid, Rear Admiral Ralph Waldo Christie who commanded the fleet's submarines, and the Naval Officer In Charge Fremantle Commodore Cuthbert Pope Some missing commas, I think
  • Done, I think? Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• twenty one Avengers missing hyphen?
  • Done Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• He was unaware of this until the afternoon of 17 May as he was embarked on the battleship HMS Queen Elizabeth and so not in close contact with the strike leader and other aircraft pilots. This seems an oversimplification of the situation, based on my reading of Hobbs--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 14:15, 10 August 2020 (UTC)
  • Good point - I've expanded on this. @Sturmvogel 66: Sorry for the slow response here - I was out of town, and ended up travelling for longer than I expected to. Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
• Comment A minor point, but I think a very brief mention in the Background section of how the Japanese invaded and occupied the Dutch East Indies in 1941/1942 would be helpful. This could also be used to give context to the Allies and the very existence of the war. -Indy beetle (talk) 02:57, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
  • That's a good point - done. Nick-D (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
    • One issue remaining above, but add a link to oil refinery--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:52, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
      • @Sturmvogel 66: Done. Thanks again for your review - the article is much stronger. Nick-D (talk) 22:51, 14 August 2020 (UTC)