Talk:Jiraiya (Naruto)/GA1
Latest comment: 10 years ago by 1ST7 in topic GA Review
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Reviewer: 1ST7 (talk · contribs) 01:20, 13 October 2013 (UTC)
I'll review this nomination. Initial comments should be posted soon. --1ST7 (talk) 01:20, 13 October 2013 (UTC)
Here's the review:
- Well-written
- The biggest issue with the way the article is written is that it doesn't really comply with Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Writing about fiction. The discussion of the character should be told from a nonfictional perspective, but this article is written mostly in an in-universe form. It needs more secondary information, such as a section detailing the creation and conception of the character and perhaps more about its real-world influence.
- This phrase is somewhat confusing: "Orochimaru when betrayed Konha, Jiraiya pursued him and tried to convince him to return."
- The wording for this is a little awkward: "Several reviewers for manga, anime, video games, and other related media have provided praise on Jiraiya's character." I would suggest rewording it to something like this: "Several manga, anime, and video game reviewers have praised the character of Jiraiya."
- In the reception section, it's better not to use the word "note" or any of its variants to describe something a person said, as it is on the Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Words to watch list.
- Verifiable with no original research:
- Pretty much everything is cited, but the article relies on references to primary sources.
- Broad in its coverage:
- See the first point under "well-written".
- Neutral:
- Stable:
- Illustrated, if possible, by images:
I'll put the article on hold for a week to give you time to address these issues. Thanks for your work on this! --1ST7 (talk) 05:01, 14 October 2013 (UTC)