Talk:Horned sungem/GA1

Latest comment: 3 months ago by Grungaloo in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Grungaloo (talk · contribs) 16:45, 6 February 2024 (UTC)Reply

Love a good bird article - I'll pick this up. I'll ping you in the next few days once I've finished reviewing! grungaloo (talk) 16:45, 6 February 2024 (UTC)Reply

That's good news, thanks! Jens Lallensack (talk) 18:22, 6 February 2024 (UTC)Reply


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )
3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked   are unassessed

Comments edit

  • Campos Gerais, mention that this in Brazil. I'd guess that's not widely known.
Done
  • (today, the horned sungem is recognized as the only member of Heliactin) - This could be its own sentence instead of a parenthetical.
Done
Done
  • It is also found in a small area of southern Suriname and in another in the northern Brazilian state of Amapá - "and in another in the northern", missing a word I think? Or in another "small area"? If it's the second I'd suggest a rewrite, it's a bit awkward.
fixed
  • A possible presence in the state of Rio de Janeiro has still to be confirmed. - This should be cited to the Birds of the World page. There's no cite to this sentence directly so it looks like it's cited to the IUCN redlist, but that source doesn't list this.
fixed.
  • The horned sungem feeds on nectar of a variety of flowering - Think this should be "feeds on nectar from a variety".
fixed.
  • the horned sungem was the most generalist feeder of the three - "The most generalist" sounds odd to me, and "generalist" might not be widely understood to some people. Consider a gloss or minor rewrite.
fixed; I avoided the term entirely.
  • the second egg was laid within two hours after the first. - "was laid within two hours of the first", or "was laid two hours after the first".
thanks, fixed.
  • However, the agonistic interactions of the species are expected to vary in different areas; for example - A bit confusing, is the variation expected, i.e., it's not confirmed but is predicted? If that's true, how do we know the swallow-tailed hummingbird is subordinate?
Only mentioned very briefly in the Portuguese source … I am not sure. I simplified it to avoid the issue, to be on safer ground.
  • The IUCN has assessed the horned sungem as being of Least Concern. - Least concern should be lower case.
done.
  • This species has been in high demand in the international bird trade, but from the 1980s this trade has been under control and abated. - A few changes. "The species was in high demand", the way it's worded sounds like it still is in demand which the source doesn't support. Also "the trade has been under control and abated", saying it's "under control" makes it sound like it's regulated - I would just say it's been abated.
I changed to "restricted", as it is important to note that it did not abate by itself; this required political action.
  • The sungem occurs in several protected areas, including... - You can drop "amongst others" at the end since you start this list with "including".
Done (changed to "such as" to make clear that it is just some examples).

Jens Lallensack - That's all I've got. Everything else looks good. Refs check out, pictures are good and properly licensed, and it's a good coverage of what research is available. Feel free to reply to my comments inline, and feel free to disagree with any if you think I'm wrong! grungaloo (talk) 04:07, 7 February 2024 (UTC)Reply

Grungaloo - Thank you very much! While digging into the issues you raised, I discovered some more sources which I included as well. Now the article seems complete enough that I might be tempted to even bring it to FAC. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 00:00, 9 February 2024 (UTC)Reply
Everything looks great. Glad to hear about the extra sources too - I'll keep an eye out for this at FAC one day! This is a really well written article and I'm happy to promote this to GA. Congrats! grungaloo (talk) 02:55, 9 February 2024 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.