Talk:Game of Change/GA1

Latest comment: 3 years ago by IagoQnsi in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk · contribs) 03:53, 19 August 2020 (UTC)Reply


  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):   d (copyvio and plagiarism):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall: Pass
    Pass/Fail:  

Review edit

Lead edit

Background edit

  • The first time you mention Ramblers (out of lead) is in the second paragraph. Should probably be mentioned earlier
  • I would mention On February 18, Loyola was awarded one of eleven at-large bids for the tournament before the February 28 incident
    •   In progress The Feb 28 incident was less of a singularly-important event, and more like an example of what they were facing all season. But I see how the lack of chronological order is confusing when I only touch on the discrimination aspect so briefly. I think I'm going to split the discrimination bit into its own paragraph and add more details of other incidents. I will try to add that shortly... –IagoQnsi (talk) 18:01, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply
  • Kind of odd how the Dean W. Colvard sentence is by itself. Please either merge it or expand on it to preferably three-four sentences.
    •   Done Good point. I've now added two sentences about the large volume of letters Colvard was receiving prior to his decision. –IagoQnsi (talk) 18:01, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply
  • Why is reference 13 used twice for quotes? It can just be placed at the end of the second quote
  • Please see Wikipedia:Manual of Style/Words to watch. Don't love the use of In any event.
    •   Done Changed to Regardless of why, it is clear...IagoQnsi (talk) 18:01, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply

Game summary edit

  • Why is reference 22 used twice for quotes? It can just be placed at the end of the second quote.

Aftermath edit

  • Illinois is already WL above

Legacy edit

  • Boxscore reference (#27) is not needed since the info is already stated in reference #26
    •   Not done Reference #27 is not strictly needed, but I wanted to include it because it provides a lot more information about the game, whereas the first reference only describes the game very briefly. –IagoQnsi (talk) 18:01, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply
  • How can reference 28 be used to verify a fact for an event that happened after it was published?
  • Are two references needed to verify The team was also inducted into the Chicagoland Sports Hall of Fame on September 18, 2013?

Discussion edit

Hi HickoryOughtShirt?4; thanks for taking the time to review this! I've made most of the changes you listed, and responded inline where I haven't changed them. Cheers, IagoQnsi (talk) 18:01, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply

IagoQnsi Thank you so much, I agree with all of your notes (including why you didn't change some things). Once the in progress incident is fixed I can pass this. HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 18:15, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply
@HickoryOughtShirt?4: Okay, I think the Loyola background is good to go now. I've added info about another incident, and restructured the second and third paragraphs a bit so that there's basically one paragraph about racial issues and one about basketball performance. Let me know what you think! Thanks, IagoQnsi (talk) 19:56, 30 August 2020 (UTC)Reply