Talk:Air raids on Japan/Archives/2012/March
Latest comment: 12 years ago by Dank in topic Notes
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Notes
- I'll get to this first thing tomorrow. - Dank (push to talk) 03:45, 13 March 2012 (UTC)
- "Along with the Soviet invasion of Manchuria, the Allied bombing campaign was one of the main factors which influenced the Japanese Government's decision to surrender in mid-August 1945.": Could this be a little more definite? Would you say that those were the two main factors? - Dank (push to talk) 00:31, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- For the purposes of the lead, I think that "The Allied bombing campaign was one of the main factors which influenced the Japanese Government's decision to surrender in mid-August 1945." does the job (this indicates that there were other 'main factors', which are described later in the article). Thanks for your changes so far. Nick-D (talk) 10:02, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Good call. - Dank (push to talk) 13:53, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- For the purposes of the lead, I think that "The Allied bombing campaign was one of the main factors which influenced the Japanese Government's decision to surrender in mid-August 1945." does the job (this indicates that there were other 'main factors', which are described later in the article). Thanks for your changes so far. Nick-D (talk) 10:02, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- "In an attempt to retaliate against the Doolittle Raid, the IJA also began developing fire balloons ...": I started thinking about this because "against" doesn't sound right to me, but on reflection, you might want to delete the introductory phrase.
- Consistency: US, U.S. (I'd go with US, since so many of your acronyms necessarily contain "US").
- I'm not sure what to use here; WP:MOS#Abbreviations appears to recommend "U.S." Nick-D (talk) 10:30, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
- I tend to follow Chicago (at least on usage, Ch. 5, and a few other things) when they have a recommendation. This recommendation has just changed with this edition of Chicago, so it's not clear, but MOS recommends "US" if you also have for instance "UK" ... so it's easier from my standpoint if the editor uses "US", so that I don't have to search the whole article and worry about changing it in the future if other abbreviations appear. - Dank (push to talk) 11:44, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
- I'm not sure what to use here; WP:MOS#Abbreviations appears to recommend "U.S." Nick-D (talk) 10:30, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
- "en-route": en route, unless it's used attributively - Dank (push to talk) 18:51, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- "which was designated Operation Matterhorn,": designated Operation Matterhorn,
- "Chengtu": Chengdu. Our article says that's an outmoded transliteration, and that sounds right to me.
- "counter-attack": counterattack
- "Washington, D.C..": oops - Dank (push to talk) 20:33, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- "an 'air defense oath' in which": double quotes, at least at FAC. See WP:MOS#Quotation marks. - Dank (push to talk) 23:46, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Done
- "amateur volunteers who lacked adequate training and equipment": delete "amateur", I think
- "The Japanese Government also encouraged old people, children and women": Did they direct the message to move to children or to their parents and teachers? Maybe "old people and families with children".
- "to disperse industrial facilities so they were less vulnerable ...": I prefer "to disperse industrial facilities to make them less vulnerable"
- "South East Asia": Southeast Asia (AmEng)
- "stepped-up their air attacks": stepped up ...
- "counter-productive": counterproductive. - Dank (push to talk) 01:08, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
- "Firebombing raids": firebombing raids
- So far so good. I got down about halfway, to Air raids on Japan#Destruction of Japan's main cities. - Dank (push to talk) 03:35, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
- Sure thing. I got to the end and made the changes. - Dank (push to talk) 04:17, 16 March 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks again - I really appreciate you taking the time to run through the article. Nick-D (talk) 10:43, 16 March 2012 (UTC)
- For what it's worth, I think this one of the best efforts I've seen in Wikipedia at taking a big and complex subject and summarizing it succinctly yet comprehensively. Really well done. Cla68 (talk) 12:09, 16 March 2012 (UTC)
- Sure thing Nick, I enjoyed the article. - Dank (push to talk) 18:52, 16 March 2012 (UTC)
- Thanks again - I really appreciate you taking the time to run through the article. Nick-D (talk) 10:43, 16 March 2012 (UTC)