Talk:17th Precinct/GA1

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Miyagawa in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Miyagawa (talk · contribs) 19:15, 24 January 2016 (UTC)Reply


Grabbing this for a review. Miyagawa (talk) 19:15, 24 January 2016 (UTC)Reply

  • The lead could do with a couple of additions as it doesn't currently cover all the sections. As I read it the plot, production and release sections are covered, so just something from casting and reception needs to be added.
  • The cite after Excelsior would be better tidied after the next punctuation mark.
  • The fifteen years previously bit - is that in flashback? If so, could it be said to be one, as it feels like it comes out of nowhere.
  • The cast section mostly has two citations for each - but they need to be flipped for each so that they're in numerical order.
  • Link io9, also from a pedantic point of view, is it possible to rewrite that sentence so it doesn't start with io9? Just that way it doesn't look wrong by not having any capitalisation at the start of a sentence. Totally not a review requirement.

A good article about a series that I presume there isn't a great deal of information about. Personally I think it is crazy that they went with Grimm over this - after Battlestar, Moore should have been given free reign to produce whatever show that he liked, especially keeping some of the same cast!! Nuts, but I never even knew this occurred before reading this article. Miyagawa (talk) 19:47, 24 January 2016 (UTC)Reply

  • I worked on the lede a bit; please let me know what you think.
  • Are you talking about the [1] citation? It's a citation for the name of the city itself; where did you think it should go exactly? You said "after the next punctuation mark", but the next punctuation mark is the open parentheses.
  • It's not a flashback. In the episode, the police follow up on leads leading them to the deputy mayor which leads them to his girlfriend who is the sister of Lionel Dixon. For a while the deputy mayor is a suspect in the murder, but during his testimony he leads them back to the girlfriend. Investigating the girlfriend, the discover that she's the subject of a "judicial wipe". They go to the retired judge's house to get more information but encounter Lionel and his sister there trying to murder the judge. After the kerfuffle, the judge fills them in on Leo's history, his conviction, and his acquittal. That was a lot of plot to get through to get to the story of Lionel Dixon, so I skipped over it all and summarized it. I've tried to lesson the shock of the "fifteen years previously"; its not much, but let me know what you think.
  • Do they need to be in numerical order? I went ahead and flipped them, but I'm curious: is there a guideline or such that wants citations in numerical order?
  • That's easy-peasy to change. Let me know what you think.
Thanks for reviewing the article for me! I look forward to hearing back from you. — fourthords | =Λ= | 18:54, 25 January 2016 (UTC)Reply
Thanks for answering the queries. I'm happy with the changes (although still astonished that they dropped a follow up series by the cast and crew of Battlestar. The numerical order thing - I thought it was a guideline, but I can't find it now that I've looked for it. But regardless, I'm happy that this meets the GA criteria. BTW, I was about to add that the image of Moore was fine as I've used it in a couple of and spotted that it appeared in Tapestry (Star Trek: The Next Generation). I started looking through that article and was thinking that it looked like it could go to GA... yeah, I did it in March last year and totally forgot I'd even started on it. Even now I don't remember doing it. So there you go, review karma! Passing now. Miyagawa (talk) 20:06, 25 January 2016 (UTC)Reply