Talk:ʻAkahi

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Eddie891 in topic GA Review

Article title edit

Is there a technical reason that the article title doesn't match the subject name? The Rambling Man (talk) 10:18, 6 January 2017 (UTC)Reply

I've moved it, but using a straight apostrophe. If that's not right and it needs to be a curly apostrophe as used in the body, then move it again. Schwede66 01:44, 8 January 2017 (UTC)Reply

GA Review edit

This review is transcluded from Talk:ʻAkahi/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Eddie891 (talk · contribs) 23:25, 27 April 2018 (UTC)Reply

I'll be starting this soon. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:25, 27 April 2018 (UTC)Reply

    • The blacklist links template has got to go.
    • If no image is available, so be it. Eddie891 Talk Work 23:26, 27 April 2018 (UTC)Reply
    • Maybe add a sentence about something she did as high chief in the lede.
    • She didn't do much of note besides held land and married politically active chiefs. The Catholic sympathy incident seems marginal to mention in introduction.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)Reply
    • "became one of the wives" would it make more sense to say "married?" perhaps add the year of the marriage, if available.
    • "In his own right" remove, as it is unnecessary.
    • "was known commonly by foreigners" because was is used a bit before in the sentence, perhaps rephrase as "and commonly known by foreigners as..."
    • "attended by the chiefs and foreign residents." this reads like all the chiefs and foreign residents attended. Perhaps clarify.
    • "Her second husband Kalanimoku," saying "her second husband" is unnecessary, because it is described above.
    • Source 7 needs a URL to determine verifiability.

Will address this on the weekend.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 07:05, 9 May 2018 (UTC)Reply

@Eddie891: Addressed all points.--KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:59, 16 May 2018 (UTC)Reply