Iron March edit
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Hi there! I'm hoping to get some feedback to move this article towards a GA and eventually an FA review. I've scoured the internet quite thoroughly for information on this subject, so I believe that I've accumulated a reasonable percentage of everything that has ever been written on Iron March. Now to move slowly towards ~perfection~ of this page.
Looking forward to any suggestions, Jlevi (talk) 01:58, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
Comments by Bungle edit
I had a quick skim through, not exhaustive by any means and others would surely pick up more. I may come back to it with further comments, but a few things that stood out to me:
- Lead does not summarise the article at all. It mentions that a non-profit org suggests that murders could be linked to the site, but we have no idea what the site was, what it stood for or ultimately its fate until reading the history section
- Readlinking Alexander "Slavros" Mukhitdinov isn't good, especially because the middle name is in quotations and forms part of the link. This would never be an article in that format. The "slavros" is redundant in this context
- Two refs are appended to the quoted text after the second paragraph, but the latter of this paragraph should really have the quotes there instead, especially as it ends directly referencing the quote that follows
- The section about posters mentions only American universities. Is it reasonable to assume that this promotion was targetted or limited specifically to the USA, or was it perhaps a faction operating in that area within a wider cross-continent group?
- There is mention of a new site "Fascist Forge", but this is placed in the history section. It doesn't quite fit here to me, as by the nature of the fact this is a follow-up site, it doesn't directly have any bearing on the Iron March "history" (and couldn't influence its timeline if it came after the collapse).
- I am also unsure when it was considered to have dissolved in its entirety. If the forum itself ceased in November 2017, but there were affiliated discord servers operational for a few months after that, would the dissolution still be considered when the forum fell, or when any affiliated servers/platforms also ceased?
- "The website closed in November 2017; the reasons for its closure remain unclear[2] in 2020" - this reads a bit awkwardly to me and the ref placement is not ideal
- Maybe the "leak" section could have a better title, as it details more about the contents of this then the database "leak" itself. The section already places an emphasis on those that were identified as being involved. Was it a leak in the sense of previously confidential data or more just bringing it to public attention?
- Seems to be lacking in imagery. Are there any public available ones, even of individuals closely linked/infamously affiliated?
— Preceding unsigned comment added by Bungle (talk • contribs) 16:20, 25 October 2020 (UTC)