Talk:Peter Dawson (politician)/GA1

Latest comment: 12 years ago by Wizardman in topic GA Review

GA Review edit

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Reviewer: Eisfbnore talk 21:31, 18 July 2011 (UTC)Reply

  • Don't use contractions (yes I'm a hypocrite).
  • "After finishing school, he then worked as farm labourer and a butcher's apprentice back in Scotland, shortly before coming to Canada." - "then" not needed.
  • What does "MLA" mean in this context? Normally, I'd associate it with the Modern Language Association.
  • The sentence "Dawson's time as speaker saw many firsts in Alberta legislative history, such as, in 1937, when Social Credit MLAs and former cabinet ministers William N. Chant and John Hugill joined the oppositions at independents; the first instance of crossing the floor in Alberta legislative history" is kinda heavy. Please break it up into two sentences.
  • The sentence "Dawson and his wife moved to Vulcan, Alberta in 1960, purchasing their first house every during their marriage." should be moved to "Personal life". Also, should it be "ever" rather than "every"?
  • Does the info about him being foreman for the Canadian Pacific Railway really belong in the "Personal life" sect?
  • Standardise upon one page number format. Currently, some are noted as "pg." whilst some are "p."

Placing on hold. --Eisfbnore talk 21:31, 18 July 2011 (UTC)Reply

It's been a month and the article hasn't been touched or any comments even left, so this article currently fails GA status. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 17:46, 15 August 2011 (UTC)Reply